W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Be sure to load your dishwasher before going to Heaven

1) September, a.k.a. National Coupon Month, begins tomorrow. Do you ever use coupons when you go shopping?

I used to be insane about coupons, spending hours clipping and filing them. Then, about 15 years ago I realized that the healthy stuff we should be eating almost never has coupons. The coupons are for processed foods that we shouldn't be buying anyway. So I stopped. And never went back.

2) What topics do you usually think about on your drive home from work?

I tend not to think. I've usually got a book in the CD player, so I'm thinking about it. Also, trying to let go of work stuff, so I'm not all wound up when I arrive home.

3) According to the calendar on my wall, it's still June because I never changed it to July or to August. Do you still use traditional calendars (or daily planners) or have you digitized your life into some sort of digital-based calendar?

I use Google Calendar, and a Mead paper planner, and a dry-erase calendar on the fridge.

4) What do you hope is in your "welcome basket" when you get to Heaven (assuming you'll be going to Heaven *** insert evil laugh ***)?

I doubt I'll need a Welcome Basket, but I'd take a map so I can find those who got there before me.

5) Today (Aug. 31) is National Trail Mix Day. If you were to create your own type of trail mix, what would be included in it?

I hate trail mix. What a horrible combination of tastes that shouldn't be in my mouth together! So my trail mix would be all nuts, or all candy, or all raisins.

6) Today is also Eat Outside Day. Do you enjoy going on outdoor picnics?

"Outdoor picnics"?? OK, yes, I do, but Beast doesn't. I have to laugh at the concept of an indoor picnic; because Sparky's birthday is in February--not a big picnic month in the Northern Hemisphere--when he was little, I'd throw a blanket on the floor in the living room, bring all the food for dinner out there with plastic plates and cutlery, and we'd eat there for his birthday.

7) Do you have a specific way to load your dishwasher? If so, if someone else loads it for you and does it a different way, do you get upset?

Hey, listen: if someone loads my dishwasher, and it all gets clean, I'm NOT complaining!! It would be great if they'd empty it too...

8) If there were four specific words written on your heart, what would they say?

"Act, Love Mercy, Walk."

9) If you could add an 11th Commandment, what would it be?

"Shut thy mouth and use thine ears."

10) Which of your five senses normally evokes the strongest memories in you?

My strongest memories are probably brought by smell.

See and Be Seen

People Think You Are Energetic

You are strong and a force to be reckoned with. You don't back down easily. You are hard working and ambitious. You have big plans for your life. People can count on you. You take duties and responsibilities seriously. You are a creative and resourceful person. You are an innovative and creative problem solver.

How Do Others See You?

The italics are what I think are at least marginally true about myself. I have no idea if people think I'm energetic, though; I know I'm not.

The Queen's Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
The Happy Hokey Pokey Meme

1. Who should run for United States President in 2012?

I think the Republican Party needs to start searching for someone with a BRAIN. Otherwise, I'm rather fearful about the outcome, especially if Obama hasn't fixed all the TeaBaggers' problems by then.

2. Have you ever gone to a party and snooped in the medicine cabinet?

Nope. I know people who do. We don't have a medicine cabinet in our powder room, just a cupboard with lots of beach towels and cleaning products. Go nuts, folks!

3. Why are Happy Meals happy?

I've wondered this for years. I have no idea. They have no right whatsoever to be happy. WTF, Happy Meals, WTaF?!

4. Have you ever done the Hokey Pokey?

Of course. Even my dad--who didn't dance at all--did the Hokey Pokey!

5. What song sticks in your head and drives you crazy?

Thanks for reminding me of the tune for the Hokey Pokey. Actually, the one that really does stick in my head for a variety of reasons is "Do Your Ears Hang Low?" OMG OMG OMG

6. Do you dance like crazy around the house when no one is looking?

I dance like crazy around the house when people ARE looking, at least family members. Can you think of a better way to annoy a teenager?

7. Have you ever been involved in a food fight?

No. I do not see the attraction here, which probably marks me as a big ol' party pooper, but I don't really care; I'm too busy dancing like crazy around the house.

Monday Mayhem

(Link in meme-roll)
Crummy Weather Meme

1. What city, in your opinion, has the crummiest weather?

Of those I've lived in/near, I'll go with Milwaukee; cold, cloudy winters, and muggy, buggy summers. Yuck.

2. What kind of weather is the crummiest weather that your current home experiences?

Well, I'm not a huge fan of the clouds in the winter, the humidity in the summer, and the wind. But, it could definitely be worse. And sometimes we get weather like today's!

3. When the weather alerts and alarms go off, what do you do?

Around here, I turn on the weather radio, and if necessary I hit the basement (for tornadoes) or set the alarm an hour earlier (for snowstorms).

4. What is the crummiest weather event that you have personally ever experienced?

It's probably a toss-up between the blizzards that have blown in and a couple of microbursts, i.e. mini-tornadoes.

5. Where would you rather be stuck for a month: somewhere where there is 20 inches of snow and below freezing temps or somewhere where it is painfully hot and humid?

As long as I have shelter and appropriate HVAC access, I don't really care, though it's easier to get around without snow on the ground.

6. What kind of weather keeps you indoors?

Most weather, to be honest. I have enough environmental allergies that I can't really be outside this time of year and in the spring. It's too hot in the high summer, and winter is too cold. So, late fall after a hard frost is about it for me.

7. Tell us the name of one famous person and the kind of weather you would wish upon them.

I would love to see Paris Hilton stranded on an ice floe in the Arctic.

8. If you were the official ruler of all weather, what kind of weather would you make happen?

Upper 80s, low humidity, high clouds.

9. What kinds of weather do you dread?

That yucky lead-in to a big thunderstorm, the funny light, the dead calm, the green-gray clouds. Not fun.

10. What's your weather like today?

It was absolutely gorgeous. See #8 for a description.

Curious as a Cat

(Link in meme-roll)

1) You're out to eat a nice birthday dinner with your family when the waiting staff marches out from the back room with a cake. With everyone around singing happy birthday, you decide this is the moment to make that life-changing announcement you've been considering. What is it?

"I'm going to start taking bagpipe lessons." Why not? Beast has already told a lot of people.

2) What's the last movie you rented? Was it any good?

I don't remember. We did rent Zombieland awhile ago, which was awesomely funny.

3) What holiday annoys you the most?

"Sweetest Day"--I mean, really??!

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Public Domain Photo

Why was Togo at West Point? When? Doesn't it look like that cannon might be aimed at his car? And doesn't this look like the back door of the U.S. Capitol? I'm thoroughly confused by the picture, but too lazy today to do any actual research.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The August 20 Question Meme

1. What's for breakfast?

Hmm, well, today it was ice cream cake. WAY too much sugar. I finished my slice about 9 hours ago, and think I've finally kicked the sugar headache.

2. Do you read a newspaper daily?

Nope.

3. What do you do when you can't sleep?

Turn on the light and do a crossword or read a book if Beast isn't home. If he is, I change rooms and do the same thing.

4. Say Type a word that sums up your mood.

Unsettled. If I said it, you wouldn't be able to hear it.

5. Do you remember your dreams?

Some of them. They are almost uniformly bizarre.

6. Name something from your dream last night.

I don't remember; I woke up 10 hours ago or so, and the day has rattled loose the dreams I might have remembered.

7. Name a food that describes you.

Squash. ?

8. Today you are wearing:

I've changed since I got home from work. I'm now wearing short, clamdigger-length exercise pants and a T.

9. What's in your pockets?

No pockets in the pants I've got on. At work, I had chapstick, phone, and work keys in my pockets.

10. Did you sing in the shower today?

I never sing in the shower.

11. What's the last song you heard?

"You're My Home" by Billy Joel.

12. Looking forward to the holidays?

Which ones? Labor Day? Not that much. Frankly, the holidays coming in the next 5 months have the potential for being pretty sad, so actually I'm not looking forward to them except for the ones when Sparky comes home, and only because of that.

13. Where do you want to be this instant?

Asleep. Like Beast, who is sacked out in his recliner. I'm trying to decide if I should wake him up so he can sleep tonight....

14. What's for lunch?

I skipped lunch because of the whole breakfast fiasco. However, I did have a couple of slices of cheese and some crackers mid-afternoon.

15. What's something you would like to do soon?

Get all the stuff out of my closet that I will never wear again. It's ridiculous what's hanging in there that has been hanging there untouched for months (or years!).

16. Reading anything now? What is it?

I just started King's Cross today. I may start on the graphic novel version of The Divine Comedy too.

17. What's for dinner?

Make-your-own-subs.

18. A favorite part of the day is:

...whenever I accomplish something that's been hanging over my head for awhile.

19. Are you happy?

In the very largest sense, yes. In the minutiae, lately I am as far from happy as it is possible to be.

20. Guess how many people will do Sunday Stealing this weekend?

No. :-p

Unconscious Mutterings

(Link in meme-roll)

1. Bells :: Ringing
2. Germs :: Contagion
3. Athlete :: Strength
4. Voice :: Singing...
5. Diamonds :: Hearts
6. Hoarse :: Scratchy
7. Tempest :: Storm
8. Hurricane :: Storm
9. Bumps :: Fist...
10. Jazz :: ...hands

Friday Fill-Ins

(Link in meme-roll)

1. How in the world did I not end up in the loony bin this week anyway.

2. Whenever I've lost something, it usually ends up being right in front of me.

3. Life's incredibly (emotionally) painful right now.

4. It's been a long time since I've had a real picnic lunch.

5. That was where we went to college. Now Sparky is there.

6. Thank goodness, he wasn't assigned a dorm room I think of as "our place".

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going to bed, tomorrow my plans include a birthday celebration for a dear friend, and Sunday, I want to not cry! (I have low standards, since I'm sure I will cry--it's my thing this week)

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Burger King's mascot and the mankini just aren't normal

1) The 12th edition of the Concise Oxford English Dictionary, published this month, has 400 new entries including the words sexting, cyberbullying, jeggings, and mankini. If you could create your own word to add to the dictionary, what would it be and what would its definition be?

I would remove jeggings, and webinar. I don't think we need to add much, but it should at least not be anything ugly like those two. {{shudder}}

2) Summer's Eve, the company that sells feminine cleansing products, has a new advertising campaign that promotes the vagina as all-powerful, the cradle of life, the center of civilization, and the thing men battle over. "Hail to the V," the company says. What is your reaction to this ad campaign?

If it's so wonderful and all-powerful, why the hell does it need Summer's Eve products??

3) Burger King announced last week that it was retiring its mascot who peeped into windows and popped up next to people in bed in commercials. Some people found the king creepy. What did you think?

I am one of those who found this king creepy and couldn't get a handle on how his creepiness was meant to convince me to venture into a BK. In fact, I've stayed away as much as possible from BK for the duration of this campaign.

4) The people in the Burger King commercials were happy when the king showed up with breakfast. How would you react to him showing up at your house?

There is not a doubt in my mind that I'd call 911. If there were a gun in the house, I would probably shoot on sight.

5) Actor Jim Carrey posted a video love letter to actress Emma Stone on his blog this week. If you were to post a love letter to a celebrity (whether it's serious or a joke), who would you write it to?

Bono, George Clooney, Robert Redford, Helen Mirren...people who have accomplished something beyond making money and turning themselves into caricatures.

6) Jim Carrey is 49, and Emma Stone is only 23. How big can an age difference between a couple be before it becomes too creepy?

I think that gap is way more than enough. Personally, I think anything over about 10 years is weird, and 15+ is downright odd. I mean, the fact that you're dating someone who was in the midst of adolescence when you were born, effectively could be your parent...that's ooky to me.

7) Hurricane Irene is wreaking havoc on the East coast. How would you feel if a hurricane shared the same name as you?

I anticipate that someday it could happen. My name starts with a letter in the first half of the alphabet, so...yeah. It would be annoying for the duration of the hurricane, but after that probably no big deal.

8) What is your definition of "normal?" (I will let you choose what type of "normal" you post about.)

Beast is on the road, or not. I am listening to headphones at work and buried in things to catalog. Sparky is...well, now, "normal" is Sparky is at college (sniffle), and Ruka is pretending to be terrified of us.

9) An Associated Press movie critic has listed her five favorite high school comedy movies -- "Fast Times at Ridgemont High," "Rushmore," "Sixteen Candles," "Election," and "Heathers." What is your favorite movie about life in high school?

I'll go with Heathers, since that really IS my favorite movie. "If I have to sing Kumbaya one more time..."

10) This weekend the comedy "Our Idiot Brother" opens in movie theaters across the United States. Have you ever had to help a relative out of an idiotic situation?

Every time the ads for this movie run, Sparky turns to me and says, "That movie is about you and your brother, isn't it? The name is even right!" Yup.

Cinn's Friday 5

(Link in meme-roll)
what a pain!

[01] How high is your tolerance for pain?

It depends on what kind of pain. If it's something I'm familiar with--mid-shoulder tension, for instance--I can take a lot. Stuff I can't name, not so much.

[02] What is the lengthiest period of time you will endure pain before taking medication?

Again, it depends on the pain. A bad tension headache I've learned to stop early or it becomes something unstoppable akin to a migraine (but not) that can't be tamed.

[03] What is the most physically painful experience you have endured?

Childbirth. Duh.

[04] What is your preferred pain reliever?

Ibuprofen.

[05] Have you ever tried non-medicinal methods for dealing with pain? (meditation, exercise, etc.)

Yes. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. One thing that almost always helps is sleep.

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Determining the health benefits of eating banana splits and using spell check

1) Does hearing about the health benefits of food products ever discourage you from eating those products (like hearing about the fiber content in cereal or probiotics in yogurt)?

Nope. I still eat hot dogs, for heaven's sake, in spite of the nitrates! I don't buy diet meals anymore however (Lean Cuisine or whatever) because of their incredibly high sodium content; I almost never use salt anyway, and these things make me so thirsty.

2) If you were fired from a job for no good reason and could do anything on your way out without the possibility of any future retribution, what might you do to get a little revenge?

I'd probably just sue if I felt that strongly about it. And suggest that others not look for a job there. I'm really not a revenge-y person.

3) You're at a job interview and the person interviewing you is extremely physically attractive. Do your raging hormones effect how well you carry yourself during the remainder of your interview?

Nope. I'm way too old for this. At this point, my doctors are now mostly all younger than me and way too cute for their own good. So, I'm generally fine. Besides, looks aren't everything; there's charisma, which is way harder to ignore.

4) We all know we're supposed to follow a healthy diet, but hardly anyone actually follows the food guidelines put out by the government. If you were to draw a food pyramid of your actual eating, what would be your major "food groups?"

Sugar, starches, carbs, cheese, a little protein, and some fruits/veggies.

5) There is a current TV advertising campaign in which the Windows company sets up a computer store in a person's house and surprises him or her. (Watch a commercial here.) What would you love to have secretly built in your home while you were out?

I'd like the window with the blown seal to be replaced, and that one and all the others to be washed inside and out. Failing that, better kitchen cupboards.

6) What kind of people do you typically try to avoid?

Angry, negative people, and crazies.

7) A friend just shared a link to a webpage full of misspellings from Facebook statuses and the obnoxious responses to them (click here for a laugh). What is a word you often have trouble spelling without the help of spell-check?

I love HappyPlace! Today has been a banner day for stupid spelling errors. I'm too distracted to be typing, so I'm double-checking EVERYthing. All the bugbears have shown up: missing letters, duplicated letters, bad punctuation, they're/there/their, to/too/two, it's/its...the whole shebang.

8) Today (August 25) is National Banana Split Day. What toppings do you want on your celebratory banana split?

I have never understood the attraction of banana splits. I'll have a cookie dough blizzard instead.

9) What is the worst thing to say to someone who just got dumped by their significant other?

There is nothing good to say in the situation, except "I'm so sorry." Full stop. Even if you aren't sorry. Perhaps, especially if you aren't sorry.

10) You are walking by a pay phone in public and it starts ringing. Do you answer it or keep on walking?

Keep walking, after doing a double-take: how many pay phones have you actually seen lately?

Thursday 13

(Link in meme-roll)
My Day (-Off work)
Since leaving work yesterday at 4 p.m., I have...

1. Dropped off my 15th-work-anniversary-award request at City Hall. Can't believe it, although technically by the time I get the award I'll be about 10 weeks away from my 16th anniversary.
2. Made homemade mac and cheese for Sparky's last meal at home for awhile.
3. Figured out why my peanut oil and canola oil bottles have melted. Apparently the light in the microwave is Pretty Damn Hot, even through cupboard walls.
4. Filled and ran the dishwasher.
5. Watched TV, played Facebook games, etc. Took a bath, read, did a crossword.
6. Slept. Poorly.
7. Woke Beast up.
8. Took Beast for his second spinal cortisone shot (which I hope will get him back to 50% at least, and soon!)
9. Brought him home, stopping at McDonald's for breakfast first, at 10:30.
10. Chilled out briefly.
11. Realized we didn't have a bike carrier for tomorrow, made random calls, put out a plea on Facebook...Facebook saves our bacon.
12. Went to pick up carrier from our friends, along with dorm food, a computer bag...and gas for the car. Got to hold a 2-week old baby for 10 minutes. Awesome!! Seriously, babies are amazing.
13. Packed the car. Mostly, I watched, and marked up Sparky's bike so it's identifiable in the event that it's stolen.

That's the bare-bones outline. Also, carried boxes downstairs, taped and labeled boxes, emptied, the dishwasher, found a new pillow for Sparky to take to school (!!), listened to endless whining on CNN about earthquakes and hurricanes (really, East Coast, you are not the center of the universe. I mean, I feel sorry for the poor and those who really in need of assistance in the evacuation, but the rest of you are just whiners! Grow a pair, suck it up, and recognize that most of us just don't fuckin' care about your drama! Hey, there were actually other earthquakes this week, didja know?), and watched Beast try to deal with pain. Oh, and tried like hell to not focus on the big picture which just makes me want to cry and cry and cry and cry....

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
A black cat crosses the path of a feather-clad Betty White

1) (Since Bud keeps saying I need a sexier opening question ...) You decide to change doctors, and your new doctor turns out to be one of the sexiest people you've ever met. Does his/her extreme attractiveness make you feel awkward when you talk about very personal, intimate health details?

As a matter of fact, my doctor is a hottie. He's also super nice and doesn't act like I'm a moron. Unfortunately, his office is now 15 minutes further away than everyone else I would normally see; I keep saying I should switch doctors, but...yeah, not gonna happen. ;-) It's kind of odd: Beast is now seeing a woman doctor whom he really likes. I love the present-day, when the gender of a doctor isn't really the biggest issue!

2) Today (August 24) is International Strange Music Day. What is a type of music or a specific song some people would consider strange but you really love?

I love C.W. McCall. Part of the reason is because he lived in the town where my profile pic was taken when we had a cabin there. But OMG, I love "Columbine" and "Wolf Creek Pass."

3) If someone mailed you a care package, what items would you hope were included?

Cookies. Games. Memorabilia that means something to me. Silly stuff. Actually, Silly String would be awesome! I'll have to remember that when it comes time to send off a package to Sparky.

4) Are you ever concerned when a black cat walks in front of your car?

Nope. Unless, of course, it's a skunk.

5) UCLA student Kjerstin Gruys has vowed to go an entire year without looking into a mirror, including six months leading up to her wedding. Do you think you could go even a month without looking in a mirror?

Sure. Well, ok, I would want to be sure I didn't have embarrassing clothing or hair issues or something, so maybe not.

6) Fashion-forward people seem to be flocking to feathers lately to accent their outfits. Feathers are being used in jewelry, being braided into hair, and designed right into dresses. Will feathers be weaved into your wardrobe?

Nope. I'm probably allergic to them. I'm allergic to every-damn-thing else. And besides...just, no. The only way I'd wear a feather is if a Native American gave me one as part of a hair ornament; I used to have one that I used to death.

7) What are your thoughts on arranged marriages?

I don't have a lot of thoughts about them. I'm not much of a fan, but I can see the logic of them in some circumstances.

8) According to a Reuters/Ipsos study released last week, "Golden Girls" actress Betty White is the most popular and most trusted celebrity in America. What celebrity would you consider to be the most trustworthy?

I dunno, I can get behind that result. I can't think of anyone else, though I do kind of adore Robert Redford. I would, commie pinko that I am.

9) On the other hand, who do you feel is the least trustworthy celebrity?

All of them, really. There is a basic level of distrust I have of anyone who chooses to be famous for fame's sake.

10) (Question courtesy of an old episode of the TV show "Scrubs") If you or your significant other were pregnant and if there was a test to see if your future baby would turn out gay, would you have the test done out of curiosity?

I didn't even want to know if I was having a boy or a girl, so yeah, I wouldn't be likely to want to know anything else, would I?

The Queen's Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
7 Royal Questions on Tuesday

If you could ask one question of the following .....what would your question be?

1. Your iPod

This is tricky: I don't have an iPod. I have an MP3, which I haven't used in months. So I guess my question would be, can I buy it pre-loaded?

2. Casey Anthony

"Is there even the slightest chance you're ever going to grow up?"

3. Your ex's last ex

Uhm? Another tricky one since I don't think I ever met any of my exes' exes. I really have nothing to say to them.

4. Your pet

"Are we even close when we imitate your sounds, or is it just gobbledegook?"

5. John Lennon

"So, IS there no heaven? What's the straight stuff, Johnny B.?"

6. Your great-grandmother on your father's side

"Would you make me a quilt?" (she and my grandma made quilts all the time at Grandma & Grandpa's house, but that was before I was around....)

7. Your mirror

Not a question: "Clean thyself!"

Monday Mayhem

(Link in meme-roll)
Just Another Random Monday

1. What is your favorite day of the week?

Monday. I know, I'm strange.

2. What kind of restrictions should there be on wearing Speedo swimsuits?

It would be great if all men wearing Speedos fit the actuarial tables for height/weight. But really, they are VERY common in Europe. You almost never see baggy suits or board shorts there, regardless of the condition of the body in the suit. One can always look at the sky instead of the scary people. ;-)

3. You know how there are the so called "fashion police"? What kind of police would you like to be part of and why?

I've never met any actual fashion police, thank God; maybe I am too illegal to even bother with. I am, however, a registered member of the Shhh Corps.

4. What is you best comeback for a totally self-absorbed narcissistic individual?

Walk away. The less attention they get from me (and everyone else), the better the situation. How do I know? Because I got mixed up with a narcissist about 13 years ago and it was a nightmare.

5. Have you seen any good movies this summer? Which one(s)?

Nope, so...wevs.

6. What restaurant meal should we stay far away from?

I dunno about you. I should stay away from lobster; it always makes me sick. Which is a real drag, no?

7. What brand of toilet paper do you highly recommend?

We use Charmin, the red kind usually. YMMV.

Curious as a Cat

(Link in meme-roll)

1) Today, whose mouth needs to be covered with duct tape?

This is why I try to do this meme (and others) before reading other people's answers: I don't want to be prompted. But today I ran across Bud's answers before I thought about mine, and now I can't get Michelle Bachman out of my mind for this one. She's kind of been hovering in my forebrain anyway, what with Sparky watching the rerun of SNL this week which led with a MB bit, and shelving the Newsweek with her on the cover at the h.s. this morning, and the fact that she and one of my best friends graduated from the same college (to my friend's undying shame). The woman's both insane and inane, which is rather a good trick.

Otherwise, if we haven't used up all the duct tape on her, it might not be such a bad thing to keep a couple strips handy in my vicinity; I expect this week is going to bring The Mouth out in me a bit.

2) You are a zookeeper, and one day a shady-looking man brings in what he calls an "exotic animal." This animal is in a wooden box with small air holes on the top and the box is stamped DANGEROUS. He throws a picture on your desk and you look at the strangest creature you’ve ever seen. Describe it, and tell what you’re going to do.

I dunno--having watched a lot of National Geographic PBS shows as a kid, and continuing to watch a lot of basic cable shows of that ilk, combined with reading an awful lot of Stephen King and his ilk as a kid...it may be hard to freak me out.

So the first thing I'm going to do is get this guy's ID and then call the USDA, or at least animal control, and report him.

(By the way, I'm picturing something like this but with a beak and a peacock tail.)

3) Share three good things about your life right now.

1. I'm very proud of my son. He leaves for college on Friday, and has proven again this weekend that whatever his weaknesses are, he is very aware of things and is smart as a tack.
2. I have an awesome group of friends on whom I can count to tell me the unvarnished truth, and even hold me and pray for me. I know, that's not the sort of thing you may come here expecting to hear, but oh well.
3. It's summer, but it's not hot-and-nasty like August here usually is. That is priceless and rare.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Public Domain Photo

Hey, I'm Jesus-juking you all in a big way this week! It was not intentional when I wrote this, and found the photo. I do have to wonder what exactly this is all about: why is he (or He) looking at the road, what's around that corner that he (or He) is watching, who took this picture, is it doctored or an actual branch/lighting/weirdness combination? Aside from the creepy eyeballs looking down from On High, this is a lovely, peaceful photo.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The Heaven Eleven Meme

1. If you could live in any other time period, which would you pick?

Realistically, the only time period I would survive in would be the future. I'd be dead at least twice by now if I lived any time before about 1960.

2. What is your favorite topic to write on your blog other than a meme?

Of late, the only things I've been blogging are the books I've been reading.

3. What are some traits that you admire in a lover?

Conscientiousness, self-awareness, kindness, strength (physical and character), humor....

4. Could you adjust to life in another country?

Depends on the country, innit? Canada would be manageable, so would most other most-English-speaking countries. I could probably do all right in Spain, Italy, or Mexico, in a city, but I'd need serious tutoring in Italian.

5. If you could study anything, what would it be?

Early church history and polity and ancient Greek.

6. What is your favorite possession that cost less than $15?

Most of my favorite possessions cost less than $15. The most recent one is the pair of mugs Sparky got us for our anniversary, which he bought on the mission trip in June. I was virtually certain he wouldn't even pay any attention to our #25, but he did, which made the fact that the mugs are hideous less important.

7. Which color do you wear most often?

Brown. Bummer, I hate that. Oh well. I guess I wear a lot of blue as well, though.

8. What has been your “theme song”, or favorite song this summer?

Don't think I've consciously been aware of a theme song, but it's been such a crazy summer that any song that encompassed it would be impossible to listen to: mission trip, packing a kid for college, stress through the roof, Beast's back going out, FIL deciding to go into Hospice... Can you just imagine this song?? Is there a song called "WhatEVerthefuckEVer!?"?

9. What's the most romantic thing that's ever been said to you?

"I love you" is a good standby, I guess.

10. What would be your dream birthday cake?

Buttercream icing, white cake, GO!

11. What is the coolest thing you’ve ever done?

Oh, hell, I dunno. Probably all looks cooler to other people than to me; I think I'm pretty damn boring and nerdy.

Patrick's Place

(Link in meme-roll)
Sunday 7

Name seven "classic" sitcoms you’d schedule in an all-day cable network comedy schedule.

1. Gilligan's Island
2. Bewitched
3. I Dream of Jeannie
4. Cheers
5. M*A*S*H
6. Welcome Back, Kotter
7. Green Acres

Unconscious Mutterings

(Link in meme-roll)

1. Running :: Jogging
2. Hot :: Warm
3. Neighbor :: Friend
4. Reported :: Told
5. Horrific :: Awful
6. Supplies :: Gives
7. Grammar :: ...and punctuation
8. Back to :: ...Basics
9. Righteous :: Honest
10. Next door :: Neighbor

Do, Have, How Qs

(Found here)

How do you feel about the person who texted you last? Well, being as how he's my son and he's headed to college in 6.5 days...I sorta like him.

Who was the last person to hold your hand and when? Beast and I held hands yesterday.

Have you ever smoked pot? Nope.

Do you think you are an argumentative person? Uhm, yeah. Fuckin' gene pool...{grumble}

Has this weekend been good? Well, hmm, I've had better, but it's only half over, too.

Have you ever had a difficult relationship? In my experience, most relationships have difficulties at some point.

Can you read other people's expressions? To a point.

Are your ears gauged? Nope. Pierced.

Have you ever stayed in a hotel? I have to admit--I've deleted about 10 questions from this meme so far, but I had to leave this one in. Uhm, by the way, yes I have stayed in a few (!!) hotels.

Have you ever played beer pong? Nope.

Have you ever driven without a license? Yes. I don't think I've done it on purpose, though. Mostly it's me forgetting to grab my wallet when I leave the house.

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex? Yup.

What time did you go to sleep last night? The first time was about 8:45. Then again about 4. Then again at about 7. Yeah, a.m. It was a rough night.

When is your birthday? Mid-November.

Where did you buy the shirt you're wearing now? This shirt in navy.

What color are your eyes? Still hazel.

How tall are you? 172 cm.

How's your heart lately? A little erratic, to be honest.

Are you a forgiving person? Mostly.

Have you ever been around someone who was high? Yes, indeed, I did go to public school, went to college, and work with the public. I am probably in the vicinity of someone high on something almost every day I'm at work.

Ever kissed someone who smokes? Yup. Family, so only cheek kisses, though.

When you shut off your alarm clock, do you tend to fall back asleep? Yeah, I try not to shut it off till I'm actually upright and have my feet on the floor. Otherwise, it's all about the snooze.

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Cleaning up stains and contemplating life

1) A man has gained national attention after he climbed onto a Tulsa, Oklahoma, communications and stayed up there for more than six days as authorities tried to coax him down. (Click here if you're interested in reading the story.) If you wanted to go somewhere to contemplate the meaning of life, where would you go?

No place public. A desert, a cave, a forest, a mountain, a basement for God's sake. NOT a tower.

2) If you (or your spouse/significant other) lost your job today, how long could you survive living off your savings?

If Beast lost his job, we'd be good for over a year even without much major budget cutting. If I lost my job, we would just cut and not touch our savings, unless we needed the money to pay for Sparky's college.

3) What do you wish someone could invent a pill for?

Uhm. There've been many times when I'd have loved to have a pill that would fill me up and keep me healthy instead of having to eat. Not that I don't like to eat, but it would certainly simplify dieting!

4) You spill something on your white shirt at lunch. What do you do about it -- do you find another shirt change into, find a jacket to cover up with, use a Shout wipe or a Tide/Clorox pen to clean it, or ignore the obvious spot and keep wearing the shirt?

Buy a new shirt. I've actually done this. It's why Culver's is right next to Wal-Mart in my town. ;-)

5) How do you feel about TV shows and movies that random musical numbers in them?

They don't bother me, much. I grew up with Rodgers & Hammerstein. Well, not really, but their movies anyway.

6) Do you have a "lucky" article of clothing or some other good luck charm?

Nope. Don't believe in this kind of shit.

7) Today (August 18) is Bad Poetry Day. If your significant other wrote you a poem that was absolutely horrible, would you be honest about how bad it is or just go ahead and shower him/her with praise for the work put into writing it?

Those two options aren't mutually exclusive, eh? I'd probably applaud the effort and suggest it be applied elsewhere, like in purchasing flowers or something.

8) If you had to describe your personality only by saying the name of a color, what color would you be?

Smalt.

9) You're invited to a wedding and find out the couple has chosen to do a potluck reception instead of having it catered. How would you feel about having to bring food to the wedding instead of being feed for free?

Well, there goes the wedding gift, right? OK, in reality, this would be fine if I weren't traveling very far for the wedding. One of my nieces wanted to have everyone bring a cupcake to the wedding to build their cake. Fortunately, her family talked her out of this since at least 10 guests were flying in from overseas. However, for a small intimate wedding, I see nothing wrong with a potluck.

10) Do you read critics' reviews of movies before you go watch them?

Since I don't go to movies more than once a year, and I read Entertainment Weekly religiously, I think the answer goes without saying.

Thursday 13

(Link in meme-roll)
Thirteen things I can do at work now that my catalog cart is clear (for the first time in about two years)

1. Check all the items on the on-order lists to see if we've received any of them, and generally clean the damn things up. (I got rid of about 100 items that had arrived and never came off the lists--fail!)
2. Run list after list of items we own for more accurate collection count. The ones I've run already show me how important it is that I do this; we're 10,000 off on adult non-fiction alone!
3. Dead Deweys return!
4. Clean out old email.
5. Work on Bookletters order. I've checked the list to see what we own already--rough month, not many.
6. Work on this month's Awards. I've checked to see if we own any. We don't own too many Lambda Award books--big shock--but we're also low on the RITA Award-winners.
7. Reclass the moving reference books.
8. Weed the reference 800s.
9. Place collection development orders for my sections.
10. Cleanup: Subjects, Typos, Death-dates, Series, problematic authors with similar names.
11. Prep lists for above Cleanup from this month's lists. If any; LC seems to have dropped off the map this summer on their subject heading lists.
12. ...sigh... Catch up on Autocat. There are at least 600 posts I haven't read.
13. Sleep at my desk. Ha ha ha ha (not).

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Elvis lives on and SpongeBob shows his underpants

1) Last week a contractor claimed the head coach for the Oklahoma State University football team fired him because he showed up to work wearing a rival's t-shirt (the University of Oklahoma). Are there any sports teams that you strongly oppose just because they're rivals of your favorite teams?

Not JUST because of that, but I am dreadfully tired of hearing about the arch-rival of my favorite football team every.damn.day. There clearly was something going on here besides wearing a T-shirt one day. And it makes me wonder what would happen to someone wearing a Nebraska shirt.

2) Speaking of sports, have you ever taken part in a fantasy sports league?

Nope. Way too much brain-power necessary for this for me.

3) According to a recent University of North Carolina study, there are now five fast-food restaurants for every supermarket in the U.S. How often do you eat fast-food as opposed to eating food purchased at a grocery store?

Far too often. It's actually kind of scary.

4) The Food Network kicked off its second season of its show "The Great Food Truck Race" over the weekend. Do you ever eat food from a food truck?

No food trucks around here, unless you consider buying food at the Farmer's Market "food truck" food.

5) Some places have laws against the sale of liquor on election days. How do you feel about the sale of liquor on the days when people are casting votes in elections?

I'm all for it. Some election days I need a drink to cleanse my conscience after voting.

6) Today (Aug. 17) is National Thrift Shop Day. What is something you got second-hand that turned out to be very useful to you?

Most of Sparky's childhood clothes and a lot of his favorite toys were second-hand. MUCH cheaper, an important thing at that point in life.

7) Have you ever poured salt on a slug and watched its body disintegrate as it loses its internal liquid?

No slugs in my life. Sorry. Moving on ... [...not without wondering if some of the slu..., er, patrons at my library/workplace would disintegrate with the application of salt...hmm...]

8) Target has been advertising a SpongeBob SquarePants backpack on which he was wearing only tighty-whities underwear. That seemed weird to everyone I talked to, and no one really wanted to know what type of underwear he wore. Do you ever wonder what type of underwear the people around you are wearing?

Have you ever watched SBSP?? Cuz, yeah, he wears undies. And for the most part I try NOT to think or acknowledge the existence of people's underwear, although VPL does exist here in Flyover Land.

9) Would you rather sleep for three straight days or stay awake for three days?

Neither. I don't want to miss three days of my life, and staying awake that long is just begging for weeks of hassle afterwards.

10) Yesterday was the 34th anniversary of the death of Elvis Presley. With all the supposed Elvis sightings over the years, do you believe he really died on August 16, 1977, or do you think his death was faked and he lived at least for a while after that day? Or maybe you think he is still alive today?

He's dead. Really. Along with Marilyn, Jimi, and Amy W.

The Queen's Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
Mimi's Old Memes Meme

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? (from The Silly Questions Meme)

OK, I've answered this question 12 times in the past. I don't remember looking at myself at all this morning. I did my hair, but I was looking at my hair. I don't really ever look at myself that closely.

2. Name something about humanity you absolutely hate. (from The Monday Melee Meme)

And this was a regular on the Monday Melee, so it's been answered a few times. I really wish we could step outside ourselves more consistently.

3. What was the first lie your mother ever told you? (from Ten Lies My Mother Told Me meme)

Aha! A new one! The first one was probably, "It's ok" when I was a baby. It's the first one we all here, I expect. The first one I remember? Uhm...wow, I can't honestly remember mom lying to me.

4. Name one thing you should never say around a Ouija Board. (from The Ten Things You Should Never Say Around a Ouija Board meme - from Frank @ Honk'n'Hollr)

Another new one! :-) I don't believe in Ouija, so I'd ask ANYthing.

5. What kind of soap is in your bathtub right now? (from the I Think I Caught Something Meme)

Three previous hits on this one. The answer has changed too: there's two kinds of bodywash, one face wash, and no soap.

6. If a doctor told you today that you were pregnant, what would you say? (The Honesty Meme)

Four previous hits. And the answer is the same, more or less: I would find another doctor. There's literally no way I could be pregnant short of some kind of biblical-level miracle involving reconstituted body parts.

7. Are you in a complicated love situation? (from The Don't Call Me, I'll Call You Meme)

ALL love situations are complicated! [first time for this one, as far as I can tell--even though it's really familiar]

Monday Mayhem

(Link in meme-roll)
We're Ticked Off!

1. What made ticked off the most yesterday?

Mostly, myself.

2. What ticks you off about your local mail service?

Oh do NOT get me started on this! We actually pay for a p.o. box in the town where I work because our mail delivery here is so psycho. I'm not even going to get started on this one, because my blood pressure will skyrocket.

3. What ticks you off about the opposite sex?

Men tend to 'tough it out' too much, IMHO. I think that's a cultural thing, not a genetic thing, though, so I can't really blame them.

4. What ticks you off about eating out?

"Everything ok?" three minutes after the food has arrived, usually asked while my mouth is too full to answer, or before I've even had a chance to start eating.

5. What ticks you off about the internet?

Bad writing. And flashing .gif images. And the all-around busy-ness that people think makes me want to stay on their site when the exact opposite is true: give me white (or whatever color) space and good font with your intelligent content, please!

6. What famous person really ticks you off?

Just one? Really? This is a total Sophie's Choice question. Today, we'll go with "everyone on FOXsnooze."

7. What ticks you off about people on the road?

Go.The.Freaking.Speed.Limit. Or pull over.

8. Name something about politicians that ticks you off.

Pandering.

9. Tell us about a story you have recently heard that really ticked you off.

So, there's this local woman who disappeared about a year ago while visiting friends several hundred miles south of here. There is a Facebook page dedicated to finding her. And the main people who post on that page are the most opinionated, vindictive, idiotic, self-centered people EVER! Accusations and counter-accusations, 7th-grade "I've Got a Secret" comments, general schoolyard bullying of people who make conciliatory statements. It's like a freaking soap opera of the worst kind: The Real Housewives of [My] County. Sigh. I should just quit, but I really want to know when (if, really at this point) they find her.

10. Are you feeling less ticked off now?

No, actually, just the opposite. :-P

Curious as a Cat

(Link in meme-roll)

1) What if George Washington were running for president today? Write his Twitter announcement (140 characters or fewer). It can be serious, humorous, or somewhere in between.

I think this actual quote (from 1799) would work right now: "To contract new debts is not the way to pay old ones." I really gotta say, I'm not sure he'd get elected today, and that makes me a bit sad.

2) What is more terrifying to you personally: thunderstorms, blizzards, or hurricanes?

I think of those three, I'd have to say hurricanes, primarily because I've never been in one. Blizzards, real ones, are horrible to be in--nice to watch from indoors, though.

3) What's your ideal home?

Lots of windows, a big kitchen, quiet, well-planned HVAC, and peopled with my dear ones.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Public Domain Photo

Brrr...in spite of it being August, I'm not ready for winter. In fact, the past week has been cooler than normal for August; we haven't had a lot of that dismal humid-plus-ungodly-high-temperatures this summer, so there hasn't been that craving for snow that usually hits about now. I'm sure temps will spike about the time school starts around here so that the kids can suffer while they're in class.
Also, the word "gazebo" always makes me smile: my brother-in-law Reg used to kiddingly tell me it was pronounced "GAYZ-ee-bow" which is just a lot more fun to say anyway, and since it may be pretty much a made-up word...we can do what we want, right?

What the... ?

OK, all the comments from all the memes I did this week just posted in Google Reader in the past half hour. So, my apologies for not replying to any of them all week. Stupid RSS feed must've borked.


Incidentally, I make be a little less active for the next few weeks. We'll see how things go.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The 31 Meme, Part Two: In Memory to Clyde

16. What's the longest shift that you worked at a job?

I did a couple of overnights shelf-reading at my first full-time job. Yes, I was insane. Also, young. I thought this would make a difference. It didn't.

17. What was the last concert that you attended?

I guess that would be TobyMac and Skillet on my birthday.

18. What the last DVD (or Blu Ray, of course) movie that you watched?

It's been a REALLY long time since I brought home a movie to watch. I guess it was Part One of the last Harry Potter book.

19. How did you like the film?

It was good. I haven't seen the end yet. :-(

20. What comedian do you love?

George Carlin has my heart always and forever.

21. Do you ever sleep in the nude?

Rarely. I get cold.

22. Have you ever had a long distance relationship?

Yup.

23. What do you think of astrology?

I think it's bunkum. Much like Blogthings.

24. What's you're favorite lyric quote from a song?

Depends on the day. Today I've got "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine" sorta stuck in my head.

25. Tell us something random about yourself.

My mouth is so small that the orthodontist had to pull four molars so that he could move my teeth back so they fit in my mouth.

26. Have ever attended a theme party? If yes, do tell.

Not that I'm aware of, unless you count those ridiculous demo parties (Tupperware, etc.).

27. What is your favorite thing about winter?

Freshly fallen snow is absolutely lovely. Unless, of course, I have to drive somewhere.

28. What was the name of your first pet?

Peppy (the parakeet).

29. What have you done so far this weekend?

Laundry, shopping, more laundry, visiting with FIL, mopping, more laundry, dishes, emptying my old footlocker so Sparky can pack it up with his college stuff, more laundry, assorted "helping Beast" tasks, napping, more dishes.... So, the usual weekend stuff with "College Packing" stuff added in.

30. Has your humor ever been called “sick”?

Oh, yeah, regularly. I have to watch my mouth--it gets me in trouble. For instance--this isn't 'sick' just inappropriate--when one of the church youth group girls was studying for her driver's exam, she said something about "Unprotected Left Turns" and I without thinking I said those were the kind that didn't use condoms. She still gives me grief about this once in awhile.
Also, my brother was a cop, a firefighter, and an EMT, so I learned a LOT about black humor at a young age (like, 10).

31. If you could have one thing, what would it be?

Oh, I dunno, perpetual health for Beast (and me) sounds really good right now.

Unconscious Mutterings

(Link in meme-roll)

1. Eating :: Noshing
2. Cowboys :: ...and Indians
3. Nightmare :: Dream
4. Impress :: Show Off
5. Year :: 12 months
6. Kiss :: ...and make up
7. Corn :: Allergy
8. Humping :: Dogs
9. Mirror :: Reflection
10. Brains :: Smarts

Patrick's Place

(Link in meme-roll)
Saturday Six

1. Other than your computer or anything connected to it, what object is closest to you now?

I'm in my usual nest on the sofa: there's a blanket next to me (in case my feet get cold), and two books and a box of Kleenex under it, while on the other side there is the table with a can of pop and a glass and some other random stuff including writing utensils and paper.

2. Extend your right arm all the way to the side: what object is your hand closest to at that moment?

Sparky's packing list for college is the first thing I touched.

3. Same exercise with your left arm: what object is your left hand closest to at that moment?

The rocking chair.

4. What book is closest to you now?

Guide to the Vatican Museums and City; and We Are Not Amused : A Royal Miscellany.

5. Other than your computer, what electronic gadget is closest to you now?

I think my MP3 player is on the lower shelf of the table somewhere ... otherwise it's the lamp behind me or Sparky's laptop.

6. And now, an old-school writing question: how many pencils and pens are within reaching distance of you right this minute?

Two pens and a pencil. I'd be willing to bet that Sparky has a pen in his pocket, and since he's sitting at the other end of the couch, it's probably (technically) within reach too.

Six Word Saturday

(Link in meme-roll)

Today is another day for chores.

Whee!

Or not, as the case may be.

We have on the agenda today:

• laundry
• shopping
• visiting FIL
• dishes
• finding boxes
• beginning the process of packing up Sparky's crap college stuff
• bathroom cleaning
• clipping Ruka's toenails

Oh, yeah, you know it: my life is totally about the thrillz!

Saturday 9

(Link in meme-roll)
My Best Friend's Girl

1. Have you and a friend ever have an argument because you were attracted to the same person?

Not an argument per se, but I have a vivid memory of walking out of Mr. Gatti's Pizza to cry in the parking lot because L@ur@ was draping herself all over W@rren, with whom I was going through yet another period of lust-oration with at the time. We both knew perfectly well that he really only dated short blondes (which neither of us were), but he was (is) a tremendous flirt. Anyway, Ter! followed me outside eventually and talked me down and I went back in and joined the group after a time.

2. Who never returns your phone calls?

Uhm? I don't call that many people. I can't think of anyone who seems to purposefully avoid me. The only person I can think of, really, is the person in charge of the yearbooks at the Catholic high school in town; I never heard from her at all last year, so we're out two years' of their books at the library.

3. What was your favorite childhood toy?

My brother's Matchbox cars. Jacks. A jumprope. Perhaps all the books I read count?

4. Who is the last person you greeted at your door?

Three girls came by last night doing a scavenger hunt. They scammed got a red crayon, a toothpick, and a bottle top from us.

5. Would you change anything about your life right now?

Hell, yeah. Where to start? On the other hand, my life is really pretty good, so right at this particular moment I'll stay the course. Besides, there's that whole "devil you know" thing; I don't want to jump into the fire from the frying pan (to mix up metaphors thoroughly).

6. Who is the easiest person for you to talk to?

Depends on the topic. Beast, Jenny, Amy, even Sparky, given the right subject matter.

7. If you could live in any ancient city during the height of the quality of its society and culture, which one would you choose?

I would like to stipulate that I would be among the wealthy and powerful class, and male, for this adventure. And then I'll be headed to Rome c. 60-80 C.E.

8. What is the most exciting event you’ve ever witnessed?

In person, I guess it would be the buildup to the Pope's visit to Athens 10 years ago, the first time a Pope had been to Greece in a millennia (or something like that). While we were not aware that our visit was going to coincide with the Pope's, it was something to experience all the heightened emotion; we actually left town for the day of the visit since our hotel was quite near the location of (one of?) his appearances and we wanted nothing to do with the protests that had begun the night before. When we returned in the evening, we got to see buses full of people arrested at the demos being brought to the police station across the street from our hotel. It was NOT a particularly pleasant time to be viewed as Western, i.e., non-Orthodox.

9. What do you consider the ideal age to have a first child?

Whenever you have your house in order--mentally, physically, financially, emotionally. I know people who've started families at 20 and others whose first child arrived at 40. I think if you're much past 50 you may be working on some kind of ego-boost trophy thing, which also could be said for having a child while still school-aged. However, I'm not sure anyone can possibly be 'ready' for the day when they become 100% responsible for the health and well-being of a needy, helpless being.

Ch-ch-changes

You Should Change the World By Working Hard

You have a defiant streak. If someone tells you that you can't do something, it makes you that more determined. You have a passionate inner drive, and you know deep down that you're destined for greatness. You take on huge projects and see them through. You lead the way when it comes to success. You are well suited to tackle the worlds most difficult problems and injustices. You will never give up.

How Should You Change The World?

Well, that first bit is 100% accurate, but after that things sorta hit the skids.

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Bert & Ernie may be left-handed but they're not gay

1) Today (Aug. 12) is National Middle Child's Day. What is your placement in your family's birth order?

I am unequivocally the baby. But because I was so long after the other kids (10 years between me and my bro), I'm also almost an only.

2) Tomorrow (Aug. 13) is International Left-handers' Day. Are you right-handed, left-handed or ambidextrous?

Right-handed. My left arm is pretty much there only for balance (and today, to cause me great pain in my back...sigh).

3) Are there any weird combinations of food that you love to consume -- like a hamburger made with a sliced doughnut instead of a bun (or something a little less odd than that)?

I like potato chips, the ripply kind, on a white bread and American cheese (and butter) sandwich. It's actually about the only way I do like potato chips.

4) After a petition for Sesame Street's Bert and Ernie to get married grew to more than 5,000 signatures, Sesame Street has come out and said Bert and Ernie aren't gay and won't be getting married. Have you ever wanted two fictional characters of the same sex to become lovers?

No, I can't say as I have. And Bert & Ernie aren't gay. Jeez, people, get a freakin' life. It's a TV show, not real life. Sesame Street muppets are asexual anyway.

5) What is a common misconception people have about you?

That I'm quiet, kind, and organized. STEE-RIKE, YER OUT!

6) Tomorrow (Aug. 13) is National Garage Sale Day. Have you ever seen anything weird for sale at a garage/yard/rummage sale?

That's usually ALL I see at garage sales! That's also why I stopped attending them.

7) Do you have any extreme hobbies (sky diving, bungee jumping, whitewater rafting, etc.)?

I've always wanted to go sky-diving or bungee-jumping. I'm afraid that ship has sailed, however.

8) Today is National Kool-Aid Day. Do you like to drink Kool-Aid or another child-oriented drink?

No, thank you; way too sweet, even for me! I used to eat the pre-sugared mix out of the can as a kid though. (see #3 above for why I felt the need to share this).

9) Korean researchers have supposedly determined that the lower the ratio between the length of a man's index finger and his ring finger, the larger his penis may be. (Read the article here if you so choose.) Would you ever be a participant in a study determining such intimate details about the human body?

I can't believe I just read this article. I will say that nowhere in there did it clearly state that these guys willingly participated in the study. I mean, really: how many guys are likely to be thrilled with a bunch of people standing around and measuring "when it had been stretched as much as possible." And how does one determine "as much as possible" anyway? Going to go wash my brain now....

10) Tomorrow there will be a full moon. Do you believe the superstition that weird things happen on the night of the full moon?

...brain has been scrubbed. The full moon absolutely causes people to act weird. I know scientists have studied this too and come to a different conclusion, but I'm pretty sure nothing at all was "stretched as much as possible." Great, I need to wash my brain again, now. {{shudder}}

Friday Fill-Ins

(Link in meme-roll)

1. The only question is, now that I have a list of to-dos for the weekend, will I do everything on it. Guess I'll know on Monday!

2. "Don't try to live your life in one day." (can you name that singer?)

3. Three things on my desk: at work, we'll go with stapler, kleenex, and an old picture of Sparky in a frame. At home...it is to laugh; I probably have more than three prehistoric layers on my desk. Again.

4. Well, oops, I guess take Beast in to drop his car to be serviced is the one thing I HAVE to do today! I did, and took him back to pick it up too.

5. I love playing with the internet.

6. Back pain overwhelms the senses.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to homemade mac n cheese, tomorrow my plans include laundry and more chores, and Sunday, I want to go to church to hear Al's 'sermon' and say goodbye to Annie!

Friday 5

(Link in meme-roll)
Evidence

1. What could serve as physical evidence that you sometimes lose focus?

I would point to my former vehicle, the one I drove into the neighbor's truck while I was fishing around under the seat for a CD.

2. What could serve as physical evidence that you are loved?

Do hugs count as physical evidence? If not, then perhaps the anniversary present we got from Sparky last month. Yes, he remembered and bought something he noticed, by chance, while we were on our mission trip.

3. What could serve as physical evidence that you’re from wherever you’re from?

My accent has more than a little Colorado in it, although it's fading/faded. I guess the other option is the radioactive trace from Rocky Flats could work.

4. What could serve as physical evidence that you went anywhere this past week?

Since the only place I went this week is work and various fast-food places, you could check the number of items I cataloged or look in the garbage for the packaging.

5. What could serve as physical evidence that you recently caved in to temptation?

Check my blood sugar: pancakes for breakfast and day-old Dunkin Donuts for snack.

Cupcakes

You Are a Lavender Lemon Cupcake

Your thinking process tends to be very natural - with no beginnings or endings. You are always in the middle. You are philosophical, thoughtful, and even spiritual. You seek depth. You are sensitive and responsive. You can't help but be thin-skinned. You are aware of all your feelings and impulses. You don't always act on them, but you know they're there.

What Exotic Cupcake Are You?

OK then. I took this quiz 3 hours ago and forgot to hit "Publish." Sign of deep thought, right?

Also, the one time I knowingly had lavender, I had a stomach ache the rest of the day. It was not a cupcake, though.

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Playing in the sand and tattooing your body

1) My coworker who sits at the next desk often texts me during work to communicate with me without anyone else knowing what she's saying. Do you ever text someone who is in the same room as you?

Yup. Text, and IM; both are almost as good as speaking a foreign language in front of those who don't speak it.

2) How do you feel about people naming their pets with people names (like Maddox, Luke, and Sarah) instead of more pet-type names (like Paws, Spot, Boots, etc.)?

What is this obsession with animals this week? I don't really care what people name their animals. My niece named her pets Symphony, Rhapsody, Melody, and Harmony; isn't that weird?

3) Do you have a "junk" drawer in your home? What types of items are stuffed in there? (Feel free to share a photo of the contents if you want.)

No pics of that, perish the thought. Let's see, from memory...at least three screwdrivers, wall hooks (the stick-on kind), wall putty, exacto knife, shoelaces, mower key, electrical tape, hammer, small light bulbs, multi-tool, extra house keys, other random keys...I'm sure there's more, but I'm too lazy to go look.

4) Would you ever buy a neon pink car?

I'm not sure I'd ever even ride in a pink car, regardless of the shade. Pink is the devil's color.

5) If you could come up with a slogan for the welcome sign that welcomes visitors to your city, what would the slogan be?

"Welcome. Feel free to shop here wherever you can find a place to spend your money. Consider that your challenge!"

6) What's the most exciting thing about your life right now?

Sparky's headed to college in 15 days. Beast just got out of the hospital last week. FIL is on hospice watch, though not in any urgent way. Take your pick.

7) Today (Aug. 11) is “National Play in the Sand Day.” If you were at a beach right now building a sandcastle, what would it look like?

I would be sleeping if I were on the beach right now, not building sandcastles.

8) If a company offered to pay you $100,000 to get an advertisement for its product tattooed on your body, would you do it?

Nope. I wouldn't pay to get a tat, why would I take money for it?

9) You're a kid again at a party with a pinata. What type of candy do you hope pops out of the pinata after you hit it?

American Smarties.

10) If someone wanted to win your heart, what would he/she need to do?

Be supportive, be self-motivated be smart, have a good sense of humor, keep me honest, be humble.

Thursday 13

(Link in meme-roll)
Chores for This Weekend

1. Laundry
2. Vacuum the whole house
3. Mop the floors that need it
4. Make grocery list
5. Grocery shop
6. Go over Sparky's College Needs list and see what is left on it, make list
7. Find boxes for packing for Sparky
8. Clean off desk
9. Clean windshield
10. Fix missing foot on this laptop
11. Clean out my dresser and closet
12. Visit FIL
13. Get the rest of the Youth Group stuff together to hand off to the next leaders

Fortunately, I have three days to do all this! :-)

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Leaving a legacy of pet costumes and painted canvases

1) What would be the worst thing to find inside a bucket placed on your front porch?

Uh...? I don't leave buckets on my front porch...? There is a wood-lath box, a partial cord of wood, two chairs, a table and a spinny. Finding the bucket, just the bucket, wouldn't be too cool.

2) August is "What Will Be Your Legacy Month." What legacy do you hope to leave behind?

Reading reading reading! Books, books, books! Also, lots of hugs.

3) If inanimate objects came alive when no one is looking, what object would you be most interested in trying to catch walking around in secret?

Wow, I don't think I smoked the right drugs for this meme at all! It'd be interesting watching the silverware, I suppose.

4) I will be getting married next year. What should my friends and I do for a bachelorette party?

Ugh. The mere thought of these gives me a horrible case of nausea. Can't you all just go out and have a nice meal somewhere or hang out at the beach for a day, or something low-key and easy like that?

5) Polygamist leader Warren Jeffs, head of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, has been sentenced to life in prison for sexually assaulting an underage follower he took as a bride. How do you feel about his sentence?

He should definitely be in prison. And I hope he realizes what he did and stops lying to himself about how important he is. He is finding out now just how NOT important he is.

6) Do you stick to the "best if used by" expiration dates on products?

I do. Why make myself sick if it's preventable.

7) Today (Aug. 10) is Spoil Your Dog Day. Does it ever bother you when people dress their pets up in crazy outfits?

I don't worry about it overmuch. I do, sometimes, wonder how stupid dogs must think we are.

8) Speaking of pets, what is your opinion of people who create separate Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, etc. pages for their pets or children?

I find this really weird, though I guess it's one way of taking anonymity just that one step further. Whatever. If it goes in the direction of cutesy-wootsy, I find it icky beyond belief.

9) Your electricity goes out for 24 hours. What do you do to pass the time until the power comes back?

Well, the last time it happened, we ended up buying a generator about 30 hours in. We generally end up sleeping a lot, and doing a lot more reading or puzzles or whatever.

10) If you were given a canvas, a paintbrush and paint right now, what would you paint?

Something non-representational, since I can't draw anything recognizable. Or, maybe I'd do a pseudo-blueprint. I dunno. I'm not hugely creative in that area.

The Queen's Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
Random

1. What is your favorite summertime flower?

Garden roses, preferably ones that smell good and are BIG.

2. Are you behind on your blog?

I never really consider blogging to be a time-sensitive thing, so no. Last night, I did boot up several weeks of questions & pictures for the meme I write, so I'm set well into the fall there.

3. What has irritated you the most recently?

Life. Life is VERY FUCKING IRRITATING right now. I would like to petition the Life Gods for a vacation from irritation.

4. What was your last Facebook status post?

"‎If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door." --Paul Beatty

5. When is the last time you laughed?

Laughed hard? I think I about burst last week laughing at something, but I don't remember what. It was totally stress-based laughter, so much so that I had to consciously stop so I wouldn't roll over to full-blown sobbing. Regular polite laughter: did some of that today.

6. What can absolutely ruin your day?

Waking up, some days.

7. What is the one thing that always brightens your day?

Finishing a middling-hard crossword.

Curious as a Cat

(Link in meme-roll)

1) Create a new human culture and describe it as thoroughly as possible. Be sure to describe appearance, values, beliefs, etc.

Oh dear, I can't believe I asked people to work this hard! I think it would be wonderful if we had a culture that was based on actual accomplishment that was equally valued regardless of whether it was sports, arts, nursing, entertaining, or being supportive of any or all of the above. I think it would be awesome if everyone was accepted for who they were as long as they were doing the best they could at any given time, and not impinging on other people's turf or time. I would love a society where people really did care more about others than themselves, without denigrating themselves in the process; just that others would come first most of the time. And permanent press would not be used for clothing. Yuck.

2) Which animal makes the best pets? Defend why this is clearly the greatest option.

Generally, I'm a dog person. How can you not be charmed by an animal who will willingly snuggle with you given even the slightest encouragement, an animal that always wants you to love it, an animal that thinks you're God, an animal that forgets what a jerk you were earlier (like 10 minutes ago) and still love you even after you yell at it, or desert it for the whole day while you're at work.

3) What was the last thing you broke that you’re really upset about?

I'm pretty pissed that I lost something Beast gave me to keep safe while he was in the hospital. It's not anything expensive, just something important to him. I think I gave it to Sparky since I didn't have any pockets, but I don't remember for sure, and Sparky swears he doesn't have it. Grrrr.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Photo © Cat. 2010

This is the pub in the town near where my sister Jean is buried. We ate there the day after her funeral last August (almost exactly a year ago), and again this past spring. Good food. Beautiful setting, in a quintessential English village. And yes, it's legal to park facing traffic in England; either side of the street is fair game. Crazy place.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The Nasty 31 Meme, Part One

1. What has been your longest love relationship?

I've been married over 25 years. We were engaged about 10 months before we got married, and we dated off and on for two years before that. Gosh, that doesn't sound that long, now!

2. What was the last gift that you received?

Actual gift is probably the mix CD that Amy made for Beast for me for our 25th anniversary; she made a copy for me. But I've had a lot of non-corporeal gifts since then, including the gifts of friendship and listening ears.

3. What do you spend your extra cash on?

Food. Mostly of the 'junk' variety.

4. If you could live anywhere would you live?

Yes, I would live. Anywhere.

5. Who's your cell provider?

Sprint.

6. What's your favorite mall store?

Either VS or Bath & Body Works. I don't really mall-shop very often.

7. What's the longest job that you've had? (No[,] parenting does not count!)

So then it would be where I work now: I've been employed by the same library since January 1996. I have not been doing exactly the same job for all that time, mind you, but I started when Sparky was not-quite-three years old.
Unless being a wife counts.... :-P

8. If you won the lottery, who'd you call first?

Jim, a friend who 'knows money' and would be the best advisor I could imagine.

9. If you won, how would you spend your money after investments?

I wouldn't. I'd probably give a large chunk of it away. After investments.

10. When was the last time you went to church (or a religious house)?

We left church about 6 hours ago.

11. What's the biggest lie that you've heard?

"Read my lips: no new taxes." And others of similar intensity, on all kinds of issues, by various politicians on both sides of the aisle.

12. When you go out with your friends, where do you go?

Uh...out. It does depend on the friends, and the purpose. It could be the mall, a park, dinner....

13. When was the last time that you cried?

About 6.3 hours ago.

14. What food do you hate?

Liver. And I'm really not fond of tomatoes, Brussels sprouts, cukes, or tapioca either.

15. What do you like best about yourself?

How far I've come, and the fact that I'm still here.

Unconscious Mutterings

(Link in meme-roll)

1. Injury :: Damage
2. Incentive :: Urging
3. Suitable :: Fitting
4. Cheating :: Unfair
5. Remembering :: Recalling
6. Nasty :: Janet Jackson
7. Games :: Toys
8. Wife :: Husband
9. Challenged :: Dared
10. Barbaric :: Sadistic (to be honest, however, my first response was "Germanic" followed immediately by "Bearded"--I read too much history)

Yummy!

You Are Mac and Cheese

You have a natural serenity that makes others feel calm. You are a safe haven for others. You love to comfort others and to be comforted in return. You believe in being easy on everyone. You are mild-mannered and not likely to offend. There's something universally appealing about you. People put their trust in you, and they often turn to you as a last resort.

What KFC Side Are You?

Of course I am! I luuuuurvvve Mac n Cheese. However, the description doesn't seem to apply to me in most respects. Oh, well, I still love the result!

Saturday 9

(Link in meme-roll)
I Wonder What She's Doing Tonight

1. Have you ever lost a lover and spent way too much time wondering what they were doing?

Well, yeah. Duh. If you don't do that, perhaps there wasn't really much going on anyway, eh?

2. What was your favorite vacation ever?

Wow, there've been so many good vacations! I miss being able to spend the day wandering around the mountains in Ouray. Really, especially since our trip last summer proved to me that I'm not 14 anymore.

3. Do you like surprises? If yes, what kinds? Or are you one of those people who absolutely has to know what's going on before it happens?

I'm not a huge fan of surprises, but a surprise party that's not mean-spirited can be a lot of fun.

4. Have you ever written a poem? Feel free to share one. Or even a dirty limerick is OK.

I have, but not for eons, and I don't have any of those old ones handy, so you'll have to go without, I'm afraid.

5. Did anything interesting show up in your mail lately besides the bills?

I got a free rental from Redbox in my email this week...because someone who uses Redbox a lot keeps using my email addy when they rent things.

6. How many of your friendships have lasted more than ten years? Which of your current friends do you feel will still be important to you ten years from now? Family members don't count.

I have friends that I've known for over 40 years. My oldest friend just found me on Facebook about a month ago--we met when I was 6. I have grade school friends, some junior high school friends, and several high school friends, not to mention college friends. Yeah.

7. Do you own a pet? If so, do you buy them presents for holidays? Do you consider your pet(s) spoiled? If you don't own one, do you think you will one day?

I always used to get the dog a chewbone and wrap it up for Christmas. It was fun to watch her tear it apart to get to the bone. Of course, our current guinea pig is hugely spoiled.

8. It's Friday afternoon and you're planning your weekend. What's on your agenda on a hot August night?

Well, this weekend, I could head to the county fair in the town where I work, or I could head to the state fair about 90 minutes from here. Barring that, I'd probably just find a good place to read a book...and do so.

9. What's your worst nervous habit?

Biting my nails. Talking and giggling to fill 'dead air.' Eating.

W.T.F.

(Link in meme-roll)
Somewhere a duck is watching you reward yourself

1) A magazine, newspaper, or website just offered to give you your own advice column. In what area of life do you advise people, and what is your column called?

Hell, no. I'm NOT doing this. I hate advice, both giving and taking.

2) If your favorite celebrity endorses a product, are you more likely to buy whatever it is?

Nope. I don't even understand how this works for people: because Brad Pitt has a Rolex, I should get one? Because Reese Witherspoon uses Revlon cosmetics, I'll look like her if I do too? Uh, really, are people this dumb?

3) In what way do you reward yourself for your accomplishments?

Usually involves food, unfortunately.... :-(

4) If you could only pick two of the following attributes to have -- being intelligent, good looking, or emotionally stable -- which two would you pick?

I can live without "good-looking."

5) On ABC Family's show "State of Georgia," a man is seen sliding down a department store's escalator while wearing lingerie. What is the weirdest thing you've seen in a store?

Nothing even close to that, I guess. Over twenty years ago, I was stunned when the clerk at a store in Milwaukee turned out to have full-on 80s-style Whoopee Goldberg dreads--and she was as Caucasian as me. But, that was a long time ago, and I work in a public library; very little surprises me anymore.

6) If you owned an airplane that can do skywriting, what message would it write across the sky today?

If I did it right now, no one would see it unless I used glow-in-the-dark 'ink.' I guess I'd probably be sappy and do something like "I LOVE BEASTY!" or something.

7) What is one of your favorite lines from a recent movie?

I can't think of the most recent movie I've seen. So I'll just say, "What is your DAMAGE, Veronica??" and be done.

8) Anatidaephobia is the fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you because of something you once did to a duck. Are you ever afraid that you're being watched?

Hah--you subscribe to the Somecards newsletter, don't you? lol Being watched doesn't bother me, not particularly. I've reached the age of invisibility anyway.

9) What are some things people should never do in public?

Pull down their pants. Really, for any reason.

10) What is something you've never seen in a vending machine that you wish you could buy out of one?

Time. NOT the magazine, actual time.

Friday Fill-Ins

(Link in meme-roll)

1. How can I explain how chaotic this month is becoming? And it's only the 5th of the month, too.

2. Sparky should get outside to weed again. He's slacking off.

3. My hair needs attention.

4. We're probably going to our 25th college reunion at Homecoming in October.

5. My favorite summer fruits are just coming in to season now.

6. Thump crash bang ...what was that?

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleeping more than 5 or 6 hours, tomorrow my plans include work (sigh...), and Sunday, I want to do laundry and also go to church!