Friday 5

(Link in meme-roll)
Five of Whatever

1. How tidy are your kitchen cabinets?

   The insides are pretty tidy. We don't tend to throw stuff in them willy-nilly. Everything has it's approved place and things tend to stay put. My spices are alphabetized if that gives you any ideas...

2. What’s an art project you did in school that you remember fondly?

   We did wood-burning one year, burning designs into wood with a hot iron.
   We were, like 8 or 9. No eye or hand protection. I don't even remember anyone having issues with either the plan or the tools. It would never happen today.

3. What’s the best thing you ate on your most recent trip?

   My most recent trip was a weekend getaway about 60 miles from here, alone. I don't remember any fabulous food. I mostly slept and read and did puzzles in the hotel room.

4. What’s the dumbest non-political thing you’ve seen lately?

   I love that you have to make this stipulation! I see stupid, or at least super-strange, stuff pretty much every day at work. I'm trying to think of the latest thing that made me actually take notice....maybe the continued appearance of people checking significant others' phones for reasons to get pissed off. Why do people do this? Why are you looking for anything? I mean, if you already don't trust the girl, why are you still dating? Focus should stay on what YOU are going to do with information you already have.

5. What’s something in your home that’s lasted longer than you expected?

   I have a table I "appropriated" from the house I stayed in between junior and senior year of college. It's got lovely lines and minimal damage (although the addition of a lower shelf kind of throws things off). It's been refinished but otherwise continues to be a nice piece in our upstairs hallway holding a lamp and a phone.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The Shipwreck Questions

1. If you were shipwrecked with friends (whether in real life or virtual life or both) think about it and pick some friends and tell us why...

   I would be eminently unlikely to be shipwrecked having been on a ship precisely once (for an extended period). BUT in the interest of saying who I would mind being trapped for a significant period of time with: Beast (cuz I like him and he knows stuff), Librarian M (she knows a lot about a lot of sensible things like what to eat and not eat, plus she's fun to talk to), Amy (she'd have books with her), Jet (he'd have a gun with him), Sparky (cuz I like him, he knows stuff, and he has a strong back), and Tech S. at work (because I've never seen her freak out, she can make clothes, and is sensible). This reminds me of doing "Values Clarification" in high school....

2. Who would throw the wildest parties, and why did you pick them?

   I don't really know anyone who throws wild parties. Sorry. I'm too old for that shit.

3. Who would always fall asleep on the couch, and why did you pick them?

   Beast, me, or Sparky. We've done a lot of couch-napping in the past three weeks, all of us.

4. Who would enter to be in a talent show, and why did you pick them?

   Annie, because the girl's got pipes.

5. Who would try to get out of doing their chores and why did you pick them?

   Me. Because I do that so regularly it's not at all funny.

6. Who would accidentally set the kitchen on fire whilst cooking and why did you stupidly pick them?

   I don't think I know anyone this incompetent. Maybe one of my nephews--James or Don--but since they're in their 40s and share a house with each other, by now they've surely learned to make food, right?

7. Who would try to domesticate an island pet and why did you pick them?

   Double pick: Librarians A & C because they are ALL ABOUT animals. Also, my niece Katherine since she's a vet.

8. Who would make the other carry their bags on a shopping spree and why did you pick them?

   Sparky, because he's used to carrying mine. Normally, I would say Beast, but he's in no shape to be carrying anything at all.

9. Who would throw the first person of[f] the boat and why did you pick them?

   Hmm. Can I have my brother do this? He's good at pissing people off--maybe the other person will just jump.

10. Who would be the best caregiver when someone got sick & why did you pick them?

    Guess that would be Julie, who is a nurse and nursing supervisor.

11. Who would try to force the another to play sports with them & why did you pick them?

    Todd. No contest. He's always messing around doing something sports-related: golf, softball, football, soccer....

12. Who would have the best holiday ideas for your space on the island and why did you pick them?

    Carolyn because she's constantly over-compensating in areas like this, and she's literally the only person I know who would carry through doing this regardless of what anyone else is doing.

13. Who would need to clean out someone others stuff to make room for their own & why did you pick them?

    Whoever jumped overboard to avoid my brother won't be needing any space, but I'm not sure would be good at packing up their stuff. Maybe Librarian T? She would just get on with it.

14. Who worries about how they will look when they’re older & why did you pick them?

    My sister Marie because it's all she talks about these days.

15. Flashes everyone when they walk by after taking a shower alone & why did you pick them?

    Marie's husband Jan, because given any encouragement whatsoever he'd totally be doing this IRL. He's such a fucktard.

16. Who wakes you to asks weird questions in the middle of the night & why did you pick them?

    Oh goodie, I get to include Rachel, without whom this meme wouldn't be complete. She and Annie would conspire to do this, as they have done in the past. :D

17. Who will constantly ask you “what are you thinking about?” & why did you pick them?

    I don't think I know anyone who does this, except me. Maybe Gail?

18. Which of your friends on this island might being too touchy-feely while you interact, why did you pick them?

    Aside from Jan? There are some patrons who verge on creepiness, but otherwise I don't think there is anyone I hang out with that's any more touchy-feely than I'm comfortable with. Because I probably wouldn't hang out with them then, eh?

Saturday 9

(Link in meme-roll)
Cabaret (1972)
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) In this song, Liza Minnelli encourages you to put down "the knitting, the book and the broom." Which of those three were you most recently doing: knitting, reading or housework?

Housework. Today's been chore-day all day until the moment I started this. I'm going to go lie down in a bit. My right leg is killing me. Fookin sciatica! Started yesterday, just in time for me to be trying to cook this week.

2) She sings that we shouldn't allow "some prophet of doom to wipe every smile away?" Do you know anyone who reliably looks at the downside of life?

I used to work with someone who did this. My husband tends this way as well. It's miserable.

3) In 1972, when this recording was popular, so was The Brady Bunch. In the two-part season premiere, The Bradys went to Hawaii. Do you have any warm weather vacation plans this fall/winter?

I do not. Maybe DC in January, but otherwise, just living day-to-day at this point.

4) Though not her uncle, just a friend to both of her parents, Liza always called Frank Sinatra as "Uncle Frank." Is there an older person in your life who isn't a blood relative, but who refer to as "aunt" or "uncle?"

Not anymore, if indeed there ever were. I am an honorary Auntie to several kids, though.

5) Liza collapsed onstage during a Christmas concert in 2007. She says she'd been nauseous before she went on and simply fainted. Sam has never fainted. Have you?

Not quite. I came very close after being dosed with epinephrine in the ER after a major allergic reaction. When I started to leave, I got to the door and had to lean on the wall...I hadn't eaten in 12-15 hours and with all the calories burned with the epinephrine, the room just went sideways on me.

6) People are often surprised when they learn Liza is good friends with Gene Simmons -- the KISS member with the long tongue. Tell us about one of your good friends.

I'm virtually certain NONE of my friends can touch their nose with their tongue!! My college roommate could cross her arms in front of her and then lift them over her head to her back. She could also step through her handcuffed arms back to front and then back. Doubt she does this anymore though.

7) Liza told US Magazine that she loves to eat at Olive Garden. Do you?

Yes. It's a guilty secret that this is my preferred celebration dinner place.

8) She keeps apple juice and yogurt in her refrigerator at all times. Would we find either in your refrigerator right now?

There's some yogurt. I'm not a huge fan of it. Apple juice...well, I don't think so, but maybe I'll get some before Thursday for the kidlets.

9) Random question: Which would be a more frustrating dinner companion -- someone who won't shut up, or someone who won't say a word?

Quiet is nice, but if it's "pointed quiet" (loud silence), it would be better to have a chatterer with you.

Sunday Stealing x3

(Link in meme-roll)
The Alice Through the Looking Glass Meme

If your life was a book, what would be its title?

Plot? What Plot? seems about right.

Who is/was the weirdest person in your life?

I see weird people DAILY. You want weird coworkers, weird family members, weird members of the public, weird neighbors? I have someone--at least one person--in each category. Mostly, I enjoy Teh Weeerd. Sometimes, it makes me want to punch walls. Today was about half and half.

What is a special thing that someone once did for you?

I think the trick here is to notice the special things more than it is to expect big gestures of love from people. Possibly the nicest thing someone's done for me this week is driving me from work to pick up Beast after he had a diabetic situation Friday night. But the flight attendants on the plane, the car driver, and others I don't even know about were spectacularly on-point last Monday on our trip home from vacation.

If you could erase someone off the planet, who would it be?

My first reaction was political. Instead I'll just say that I'm not going to be sad when Crazy Cat Woman retires from my workplace in less than a month.

What’s a big goal that you have?

I have never been a Big Goal person. I'd like to retire someday. That's looking more and more like it will be some fairy-tale distance away.

If you could time travel and meet yourself at 16, what would you tell yourself?

Like I would listen to someone my age at 16?? I'd probably just pat myself on the back and suggest being a little more careful around booze and people who love it.

If it were the last day of your life, how would you spend it?

With kids. It would be wonderful to just sit around and play with some toddlers or babies, read them some books, get some sticky hugs and kisses...what a way to go.

If you could meet any celebrity, who would it be and why?

I would kind of like to meet Tammy Duckworth. She seems like the kind of straight shooter in person that I like in public office. I'd like to tell her that not only do I appreciate her service in the military, but I appreciate her service to our country since she came back home.

What is one thing that you would never do that others you know have done?

I'm pretty sure that I'll never drive drunk.

What is one romance depicted in film that you’d love to experience?

Wow. Uhm. I'm not much of a romance-watcher. The Tracy-Hepburn dynamic, though, that is fun.

Describe yourself in just one sentence.

"O.M.G." (and not in any theological sense)

Who is the most beautiful person on earth?

Really, any random newborn is pretty awesome. It may be the last time we are every fully ourselves, right after birth, before we start wearing other peoples' expectations.

What was the best experience in your life?

I've had a lot of good experiences. One of the best was getting my mom giggling during church in the middle of quiet prayer and then both of us giggling through the Lord's Prayer. It was strange, epic, and 100% unlikely.

If you could rule the world, what would you change?

So . Many . Things. Certain famous people who talk bullshit will be wearing a lot of duct tape over their mouths until they learn how to STFU when they have nothing productive to say.

Where were you when you heard the news of 9/11?

At church. Beast called while I was doing some volunteer work. I got in the car and turned on the radio while I headed home, turned on the TV when I got there and got a call from our brand-new pastor who had no TV service. So I watched the second tower fall with him and his wife, who was totes panicking: "I need to go to the grocery store! We need to stock up on food!"

+ + + + + + + + +

The Martial Arts Meme

Who was the last person that you held hands with?

Beast. Yesterday, I think.

Are you loud, outgoing or shy?

Yup. All of the above on varying occasions.

Who are you looking forward to see[ing]?

I can't think of anyone I'm desperate to see. I just finally met all but one of my great-nephews and -nieces, so it would be nice to see the only remaining unmet one. I'm not sure about going to Texas anytime soon though, and my understanding is that his parents are perhaps not together anymore. This makes me sad, but I'm treating it as rumor till I hear from someone definitively.

Are you easy to get along with?

Usually. Unless you're an idiot. Then I might be a little hard on you.

Have you ever given up on someone, only to let them back into your lives? Why?

Yes. Once. I shoulda stuck to my guns, but fortunately it wasn't a huge waste of time.

If you were ill, which TV doctor or nurse would you want to take care of you?

Honestly, if I were terrifically and suddenly ill, Johnny Gage's presence at my side in the ambulance could probably manage to put me back on the road to health before even arriving at the ER.

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Yes, it does. I'm so my parents' kid. Having admitted that, I tried very hard to keep my personal ooshiness out of sight whenever Sparky was in need of straight talk. The need to be honest definitely trumped the prude in me.

Who was the last person that you had serious conversation with?

Beast, after I got home from work today. Life is fraught right now and sometimes emotions boil over.

What was the last text message you received about?

Last Fbook PM: "Fair. :P I've just started throwing 'yins' into casual conversation."
Last text: "Yea. She makes a good date."
Last Google Hangout: "Almost got a ticket for not using hands free"
WhatsApp: "Haha! Guess that's a nice sort of problem to have?"
Not one is from the same person and they are all completely unrelated issues, but there is some sense of continuity there.

Do you believe in luck and/or miracles?

I completely believe in miracles! My life is full of them. Luck too, mostly of the good variety. I have to say, though, that this is another case of seeing what you look for and getting back from life what you put out into the world.

What good thing happened this summer?

Uhm. It was not exactly a stellar summer. I found some serenity and some freedom. Sparky got out of a lousy roommate situation and into a new apartment of his own. And then a EEEUUUGGGE implosion for Beast at the end of summer from which we'll be recovering for quite awhile. We still haven't seen all the final ramifications as yet. So I'm learning some more about patience, too.

Convince us why we should or should not believe in life on other planets?

You can believe whatever you want, as far as I'm concerned. Until we actually find life in space, you have that option. I find it hard to believe that we're alone, as big as the universe is, but I also doubt extraterrestrial life will look anything like us, should we ever run into it.

Who was your first crush on?

David Cassidy. I was 9. Or maybe 8.

Favorite part of daily routine?

Washing my face, brushing my teeth, putting on pajamas, and climbing into bed with my Nook to read or puzzle.

Do you like your neighbors?

Of the ones I know, all but one are good people. We have some new people we haven't met yet. And the neighborhood Dirty Old Man is (YAY!) moving. Or at least the house is for sale.

What’s your worst feature?

My teeth. They are really getting yellow as I age. :(

Have you ever had trust issues?

Huh. Not until the last few years. I'm still horribly gullible, though.

+ + + + + + + + +

The "Doing Questions Like It's 2003" Meme

Tell us about your pets. If you don’t have one, share why you don’t.

We have one lazy little guinea pig named Pinto. He's a cutie, but he will be the last. I'm retiring my zoological chores when he dies.

Name three things that are close to you.

Physically close? I'm surrounded by heaps of stuff that have accrued as I unpacked last week. There are three things here I need to mail tomorrow, a book about the discovery of Richard III (brought home from vacation), and a half a liter of Diet Coke that I've been working on all afternoon.

How was the weather for your summer?

It was good. Too muggy here at the end, but I can't complain about the temperatures: they never got wildly out-of-control hot.

What was the last film you saw? Did you like it?

We went and saw the last Star Trek movie when it came out. It was ok. I like the original timeline better.

Tell us about the last trip that you took.

We just got back last Monday from visiting my English family and attending the wedding of my nephew there. He was married in Bristol in probably the weirdest and yet the most fun wedding I've ever attended. Then we spent about a week driving to my nieces' homes in northern and central England and meeting and getting to know their kids. The weather was wonderful, and the kids were great, and it was good to see people I haven't been able to spend time with in 5 years.

Where do you buy groceries? Why?

Meijer, mostly, and increasingly Aldi. And a local standalone grocery. And a local chain that's only in the immediate metropolitan area in which I live. Mostly in that order.

Tell us something that you did today. Or will do if you haven’t had your morning coffee yet.

I worked. Today was Crazy Cat Woman's and Supplies' last Sunday to work before they retire. I'm sad that Supplies is going--in spite of her politics being 180 from mine, I've really come to like and admire her--but CCW can't leave soon enough. Anyway, I found the provenance of an unusual photo of JFK and Jackie for a patron. That was fun.

Have you pulled an all-nighter?

Kinda did that a couple of weeks ago on the flight to England. I might've gotten an hour of sorta-sleep on the plane. Maybe. At most. Before that was probably the last overseas flight, or staying up with family emergencies.

Can you taste the difference between Pepsi & Coke?

Yep.

Tell us about your siblings. How many and what do they do?

Tell ya what. Here's my family. Go read. It's current. This is not a question I love answering.

What’s the oldest thing that you own?

Several pieces of furniture. My grandparents' china (boxed in the basement). Some books that are well over 100 years old--nothing fancy or worth money, I hasten to add!

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
I Want To Be Famous Meme

1. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

I'd like to be famous for being the least famous person ever. In other words, I have no interest at all in ever being "known."

2. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

I do, whenever I'm calling a business I've never called. Also whenever I call the insurance company, or to ask a favor. I don't want to sound like an idiot, and I want to make sure I cover all the points needed.

3. What would constitute a "perfect" day for you?

A sunny warm day in the mountains of Colorado, just looking at scenery, listening to wind and animals, and soaking it up.

4. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

I sing to myself regularly. If I were at work listening to music without headphones, it would be a daily occurrence. I believe I probably warbled at a coworker Friday, believe it or not; I remember because she commented on it. Really singing? Probably something with Sparky or Beast, though I don't remember anything specific.

5. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

Mind, with some stipulations. I don't want to go down the road my sister traveled with MSA. I'd prefer to keep mind AND body at a similar status level throughout my life.

6. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

No clue. Hopefully fast and relatively painlessly, since I'm allergic to morphine.

7. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

God.

8. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

I would have a better personal relationship with my mom. I wish we'd sorted out our differences.

9. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

The ability to keep my opinions to myself!

10. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

Nope, not interested.

11. What does friendship mean to you?

Give and take. Compromise. Loyalty. Laughter. Shared history.

12. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

I'm not sure I even understand that question. It's important for me to feel safe and loved and I like people who aren't afraid to let those feelings show. Is that what we're looking for here?

13. When did you last laugh?

I've been laughing at the post-match coverage of Wimbledon pretty regularly. If I were Djokovic's wife, I'd be pretty jealous of that trophy!

14. Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Morning. Although with my current psycho sleep schedule, mornings pretty much suck. I'm usually awake between 1 and 3 a.m., so I guess that's still morning though, right?

15. Seen anything weird lately?

Every day at work, yes. Actually, yesterday Beast found all his mom's parent's jewelry--in a paper bag in a drawer, so secure--and went through it. One ring is quite odd. It's an asymmetrical circle, looks like a crystal made of silver, is studded with small diamonds, and is probably 3/4" around. So weird. I did snag a hematite ring from the stash that I actually like, by most of the rest is way too showy and huge for my taste.

Friday 5

(Link in meme-roll)
Mail Order

1. What is your most recently mail-ordered item?

   I think it was these socks. Purchased because they are REPRESENTATIONAL! lol

2. What’s a catalog you’ve always wanted to order from but never have?

   There are often things in the Sky Mall catalog that intrigue the shit out of me. Also, Hammacher Schlemmer.

3. What is physically the largest item you ever mail-ordered?

   Gotta be Sparky's computer+peripherals from Dell four years ago. Definitely the most expensive thing too!

4. What catalogs do you still receive in the actual mail?

   VS, even though I never use it--right into the recycling. Kohl's sends me stuff regularly. Beast gets all kinds of stuff from Destination XL. There are more, but I'm drawing a blank. Oh, Famous Footwear is always sending me flyers, too.

5. What are some obscure or unusual catalogs you've received?

   We still sometimes get stuff for Beast's mom, who a) never lived here, and b) died almost 7 years ago.
   Also, my sister Jean ordered something online from King Arthur's Flour as a wedding gift for someone and used my address (because her English one wouldn't work) about 15 years ago. That catalog followed me from our old house to this one for about 8 years! And I never once spent a dime on their stuff! Fortunately, I think we stopped getting the catalog before she died, or that would've been quite depressing every month.

Friday 5 (late, as usual)

(Link in meme-roll)
All I Need is a Miracle

1. When has something miraculous or seemingly miraculous happened to you or someone you know?

   There are miracles every day, really. The fact that my sister Ellen did NOT die when I was a tot remains the most definitive event of my life, even though I was too young at the time to know what was going on.

2. When were you last part of an amazing coincidence?

   It's so odd that I share the same spelling of my first name to a person who regularly comments on one of my favorite blogs. It's an unusual spelling. I do a spit-take almost every time I see her name under her comments. She is, apparently, a librarian also.

3. What have you recently accomplished against magnificent odds?

   I'm still alive and still married and mostly happy.

4. In what way this week has luck been in your favor?

   I got to see the Madrigals from my son's high school sing at Bible Study this week. That was pretty awesome. And I ran into someone the same morning who will be attending my university next year. It's a small school. Sparky is a student there now.

5. What was the last outcome you consciously decided to leave up to chance?

   I'm trying to convince myself to STFU about a bunch of work stuff that is pissing me off.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
One Thing .....

that makes you smile:

Babies, or little kids, giggling. I find it difficult not to join in.

that makes you cry:

Lately? EVERYdamnTHING. I haven't gotten through a day in the past week without some tears. Wish I could figure out WTF is up with me.

that you love to do on the weekends:

Nap

that you do for only yourself:

Nap. If repeats aren't allowed, eat. Or breathe. Or... yeah, other things.

that you have in your underwear drawer that's NOT underwear:

Surprisingly, the only thing in my underwear drawer IS underwear. Maybe some dust?

that you do before going to sleep:

I take off my glasses whenever I sleep, even in the car, or on the couch.

that you do within the first 15 minutes after waking:

Well, the obvious answer here is that I pee.

that's in your purse:

I don't carry a purse. I don't own a purse, even. I have a lot of carrier bags (one for meetings, one for Bible Study, several for groceries) but no purses.

that you actually LIKE to clean:

I enjoy washing dishes.

that you DETEST cleaning:

I hate the whole process of cleaning floors: picking everything up, moving furniture, waiting for the mopped parts to dry...and watching them get dirty IMMEDIATELY.

that other people would find odd about you:

I suspect the fact that I read close to or over 100 books a year would disturb, confuse and even repel some people.

that you would buy if I handed you a $100 bill:

I ... do not know. There's literally nothing I want or need, that I've been holding out for. Maybe a bus ticket...? Or I'd just turn it over to one of the good organizations in town: Kiwanis, the women's shelter, a youth organization, something like that.

that you feel you HAVE to do before you die:

Live. I would really love to see Sparky happily ensconced in adulthood, married to someone he loves who loves him, with kids. If even some of that happens, I'd be content. Otherwise, I don't have specific plans for the next 30 or so years. Hang out, listen to good music, read good books, eat good food, help others, laugh a lot, learn more....

Curious as a Cat

(Link in meme-roll)

1) You are given the opportunity to talk to one dead person and say one thing that you didn't get to say before s/he passed away. Who would you pick and what would you say?

I would love a chance to apologize to my sister Ellen for not being around more in the last few months of her life.

2) What was the worst advice you ever gave?

Oh, I give shitty advice all the time! When I look back on things I've suggested to people, I shudder. I'm hopeful they ignored me.

3) What is the weirdest thing you own?

Well, we have 4 tribbles. That's kinda weird. Maybe the weirdest part is that I'd admit it, but I gotta tell you, they are fabulous ice-breakers at parties!

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Photo © Cat. 2012

This was taken out of the window of the boutique hotel we stayed at on Parent's Weekend in the town in which we went to college and where Sparky is currently matriculating. So, yeah, it's dusk in October, but it could be dusk today since it's actually cooler today than it was then. Anyway, this is an area called Five Points, which seems to be a recurring theme of the towns in which I've lived. The base of this photo, the bottom 1/4 of the picture, is actually the windowsill--the walls are about 2 feet thick in this building. Love this place.

Thursday 13

(Link in meme-roll)
Things Starting With F

1. Fonzie. OK, so I'm watching Happy Days. Get over it.
2. Freak. This show is so goofy. None of these actors are anywhere close to teen-aged and yet...what is the deal. Also, Ron Howard reminds me of Macauley Culkin. THAT is weird.
3. Fruit. I need to eat more of it.
4. Favorites. The staple subject of memes. I think I've been asked about every possible favorite [whatever] by now.
5. Frank Burns. For some reason, Happy Days reminds me of M*A*S*H. Were they both on the same night in the 70s? Or am I just crazy.
6. Fuck. One of my favorite words. Have you noticed?
7. Fun. Someday I will have fun again. Just not soon.
8. Food. When I start having fun, maybe I'll stop eating everything in sight.
9. Family. Mine is crazy. Yours?
10. Fan. I'm going to need to get out the one I bought last summer for the upstairs pretty soon. It's really warm up there. Already.
11. Free . Nothing is free. Nothing.
12. Friends. Thank God for 'em. I don't deserve the good ones I have.
13. Finally. The end of the list

Six Word Saturday

(Link in meme-roll)

Mayhem at work; backsliding at home

Today at work was a major fundraiser day for the Friends of the Library. It involves about 1500 extra people in the building over the course of the day, lots of them kids, and quite noisy (for a library). It's fun, but I wasn't in a great mood because Maniac caught me and was ranting about CT for the first half hour I was there. And she has bollixed up a couple of orders she's been responsible for after being 100% wigged out about this grant for which she's ordering this stuff. This is why she isn't allowed to order stuff; we place the orders for her. But those of us checking up on her have been mighty distracted this winter--for good reasons--and she's slipped a few doozies in.

About 3, I was IMing with Beast who suddenly went gonzo--"i cnt rgt now-my bck is killllin rgt now" (we normally actually are dorky about spelling things right)--and since he'd been more or less fine up till then, I was rather concerned. Especially after the last couple of weeks (hospitalized for 3 days, broken tooth, kidney stone while on a business trip). So I left work an hour early. Found him asleep-ish in the recliner, unable to have a coherent conversation (he had gone upstairs and slept ... no, no he had not). Took the clean sheets upstairs, made the bed, nagged him upstairs to lie down. We'll see how he's feeling in another hour; maybe we can salvage the corned beef.

And lest you think the latter scenario is particularly unusual...it's not. Not for the past few months.

Saturday 9

(Link in meme-roll)
Da Ya Think I'm Sexy

1. When do you feel that you are at your sexiest?

When I'm clean and wearing nice clothes and having fun.

2. What's your favorite magazine? Why?

Probably a toss-up between EW and Bookmarks.

3. What’s something you do more quickly than most people?

Alphabetize. And, lately, fall asleep.

4. When do you first remember using a computer?

I took a programming class in high school c. 1980. The actual computer was in a closet down the hall; we used dumb terminals.

5. Who is the craziest person in your family?

The literal-craziest is definitely Jan, with Katherine in a close second. The fun-craziest is probably Rosellen.

6. What one thing are you craving today?

Sleeeeep, and servants.

7. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?

Food that I don't have to cook.

8. What’s the part of your morning you least look forward to every day?

When applicable, walking into my workplace. It's not good there anymore right now. Otherwise, it's when my brain engages and starts reminding me of all I need to do today.

9. What are some rules you have for yourself that don’t really make much sense?

I have a thing about chewing equal amounts of food on each side of my mouth. It makes zero sense, really, but I've been doing it for 35+ years, so it's hard to change now.

Friday Five

(Link in meme-roll)
Zobmondo
These are "choice" questions. The rules of Zobmondo are that you have to choose one answer - you can't say "neither." You must also take the question as it is - no changing the questions!

1. Would you rather have to suck all the ink out of a ballpoint pen or paint your tongue with Wite-Out?

Having done the ink thing (by accident), and survived, I'll go with a replay of that. Nothing on my tongue.

2. Would you rather drink a gallon of used hot dog water or a shot glass of someone else's foot sweat?

Hot dog water. No question at all! Kinda hoping I get a few hours to finish it though.

3. Would you rather always wear shoes that are a half size too small or always have your underwear creeping up your butt?

Underwear. That isn't likely to cause long-term damage to my body like wearing bad shoes will.

4. Would you rather always be nauseated or always have a headache?

For the rest of my life? If it were just for a few months, I'll go with nausea; I need to lose weight!

5. Would you rather have to always eat standing up or always enter your car from the passenger door?

Eating standing up isn't that difficult for me....and again, it does burn more calories.

The Dating Profile Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
Walking in the Moonlight
This is a bit different than an "answer this question" meme. Either you have used sites such as Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, we scour those on-line dating sites to respond either a person's profile or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do. We use only "lines" that are gender-neutral. So, your mission is to respond to ten we choose each week. Seriously or with humor is your choice! [what are the odds, really, that I'm likely to EVER be serious on this meme?]

1. I love walks in the moonlight without ever having to say a word. In my world, walks never talk. This sentence would be more sensible if you rearranged the clauses so that YOU weren't saying any words. In fact, you should probably never speak again. kthxbai

2. I intend to go to my destiny instead of waiting on it to find me. Wait! Stop! That's MY destiny you're headed toward, not yours!

3. First off, I have 20 cats which I'm sure won't be a problem. [shit, it figures, as soon as I say I won't be serious on this meme...] Well, despite my nom de blog, cats are not my thing since I'm DEATHLY ALLERGIC TO THEM, ya crazy cat creep.

4. I've been called the 8th Wonder of the World. You're that old? And you're advertising that fact?

5. A nice thunderstorm with me and you will be wishing for rain. Er??? I don't get the reference. Nor do I want to. Yuck. Bye.

6. I've never been married, but don't let that scare you, it just happens to some of us. Shudder. Marriage is not chicken pox. Or amputation. Or...whatever.

7. The way I see it, life is a one-act play so am looking for someone who wants to make the best of every day. If you're going to use a metaphor, would you mind at least making a logical attempt to work it all the way out? And, frankly, most of us have more than one act in us. Thank GOD! I mean, high school alone ... gah ...

8. Jack, my border collie/lab, and I are often out walking or if we are lucky, playing in the mountains. "often out walking or [comma] if we are lucky [comma]..." or "often out walking or if we are lucky [no comma]" Take your pick. I like dogs. They don't fuck up grammar and punctuation. Can I take your dog and leave you home?

9. I would like to wake up in the morning to a loving warm smile and sexy eyes. Maybe you should date that Geico ad? I don't have sexy eyes, and my smile isn't particularly warm in the morning. Not till I've had 8-10 oz. of caffeine poured past it.

10. Hi! This is fun, no? No.

[actually, this is quickly becoming my favorite meme]

Thursday Thunks

(Link in meme-roll)
This week we will answer some crazy questions brought to you by Kimber, the color of a clear blue sky and the number 1142010.

1. Build It Yourself Coffin Kits.Creepy, interesting, cost effective, your new hobby?

Wow. Kinda awesome. Might bookmark this site, when I have space in my basement for storing the completed boxes. I wonder if they're legal....

2. Can you blow up a balloon under water?

I can barely blow one up in the air, so it's doubtful. I'm not sure anyone else can either, not with their lungs.

3. Why do you think when naming citrus fruit they simply named an orange the color it is?

OK, I think the name of the fruit came first, then the name for the color. According to Wikipedia, the etymologies of the word for the fruit and the color are the same, and I suspect that oranges were hard enough to grow outside of the Mediterranean area and the color was so specific that it didn't make sense for England--where oranges were generally not grown until fairly recently--to bother coming up with another word.

Aren't you glad you asked?

4. Insanity Cafe's topic of the day on Tuesday was this article. Have you ever known someone to do something embarrassingly stupid like that?

Not quite this stupid, thank God. My brother ran over his foot with a mower, though, if that qualifies. And my dad almost lost his eyesight doing a safety demonstration on a table saw. So, yeah, my gene pool has some shallow spots.

5. If you got stranded high on a mountain in the snow, how many snowmen would you make? Would you name them and talk to them?

The very last thing I'd do if I were stranded in snow would be to get all wet and waste energy!

6. Have you ever tripped and fell while walking up the stairs?

On a semi-regular basis. I actually get confused sometimes while walking upstairs and have to stop and concentrate. Shallow gene pool.

7. If you were to make your own currency what would it look like, what would you call it and would you give some to your fellow Thursday Thunkers?

Meh, I'd just go with the Euro. Why reinvent the wheel? And I'd absolutely share any fake money--which would be marked as fake--with all and sundry.

8. Have you ever made a Mr. Potato Head from a real potato?

I think I did as a kid once or twice perhaps.

Sunday Stealing

(Link in meme-roll)
The "What If" Meme

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

Really? Wow, this is awesome, but I'm horrible at making decisions.... Let's go with, uhm, the latest financial dude to have received a six-figure bonus for Christmas.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?

If this is retroactive, I'd like to get rid of Marilyn Manson.

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

Dick Cheney. Karl Rove. Rush Limbaugh. Y'know, come to think of it: aren't they all the same person? They do resemble each other, no?

4. What is your favorite cheese?

Wensleydale!! It is lovely-tasting, to go with the funny.

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?

Cheese (Wensleydale, of course), Ruffles, margarine, and white bread.

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?

Er, does it have to be someone still alive?
But here's the problem: it has to be someone who is currently not in a stable relationship, because I just couldn't do that to a wife/girlfriend. And, unfortunately, the guys I find the most attractive are pretty much all in stable relationships. So, I'll pass. Thanks for the offer, though.

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?

Same problem as above. My first choices are all married. Or gay.

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?

Shoes! Or, more realistically: BOOKS!

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Ydra. Or anyplace else quiet and warm.

10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?

Upgrade my lodging, duh.

11. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?

I'm pretty sure only someone of the Irish persuasion believes in angels delivering alcohol. But if a non-angel offered this, I would have Stoli, please.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?

Wait, I definitely am ONLY visiting, right?? If so, I'd like to visit my grandparents' homestead in Colorado, c. 1921. I could meet all 3 of my aunts and see my dad as a little kid. And I'd return home before it all went completely to hell.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

If you annoy me, you have to leave. At least temporarily.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?

I would love to see variety shows return. I don't care, really, who hosts it but it definitely has to be someone funny and organized and clever.

15. What is your favorite curse word?

Lately, it's been 'shit'.

16. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

I'd get up and find the joker who stood the mummies around my bed. Or call the cops. Yeah, maybe that's a better idea. Mummies don't scare me, but whoever lugged 'em into the house for display--that is a little weird.

17. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item?

One of my grandparents' Bibles. Or Mom's Bible.

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?

{shudder} This is a very creepy meme. I'd check over my will and leave directions for my funeral, and then hug my family hard and tell them I love them.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be?

Invisibility.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Getting married. I think the ceremony was about half a hour, and I have virtually no memory of it.

21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

. . .
Everything I start to type, I have to delete because the experience taught me something important. So, maybe I'd just change the last 6 months of my sister's life and spend WAY more time with her.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin’! What country are you going to live in now?

If this has to be a permanent place to call home: Canada. If Canada's not available, I'd hit Scotland, England, or Denmark. In that order.

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?

Well, it sure wouldn't be an Intourist bar, yo. [Are those even still extant? prolly not, thank God.] Otherwise, I don't care. Bars don't really do it for me--I'd rather drink at home or with meals. Or both.

24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question…. If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like “Dude, check it out…I can FLOAT!”?

Amy's. I could hang around outside her kitchen window and freak her the fuck out. If it were daytime, her landlords and their customers would get to participate in freaking out, too.

25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?

Presumably, they come back to life at the peak of their powers? Janis Joplin, and I'd take her directly to rehab, and then get her a good recording contract.

26. The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

Again, would they necessarily be at top form? Otherwise, no dice. If so, then Ellen. She's owed a few more years, and her kids need some sense knocked into them.

27. What’s your theme song?

I only get one song?? OK, then: "One".

Curious as a Cat

(Link in blogroll)

1) What part of your day-to-day life requires the most patience from you?

Being interrupted or having plans or schedules change. I'm not as good at 'going with the flow' as I look like I am. It disrupts my center, though less than it used to. So, I guess, that's progress.

2) What are your favorite winter activities?

Sitting by the fireplace, scraping snow and ice off my truck windows, shivering, staying under the covers in the morning as long as possible to avoid the cold, trying like hell to remember that spring and summer WILL come again....

3) What do you think of high heels?

I love wearing them. I think they are absolutely ridiculous.
This example of mutually opposing concepts brought to you by your average, ordinary woman. No thanks are necessary.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Public Domain Photo

Truly weird photo. Definitely a good one for those of us who like a little spooky in our lives. It reminds me of "Macbeth" and midsummer night's eve celebrations.

The Queen's Meme

(Link in blogroll)
The Woodstock Meme

The scene: You are at Woodstock. You go alone but meet up with a beautiful man/woman. You spend three days together.
Put yourself inside the peace & love vibe. You can choose to be stoned or straight. I put it in the story for the sake of reality. Just don't inhale in this meme.
This is the conversation you have upon meeting or you can make it into what you overhear others say.
It makes no sense and has no continuity by design.
You must fill in the familiar blanks to finish the story. Some are song lyrics. You may use more than one word to fill in the blanks.

Oh! I forgot to tell you (must be the smoke in here) You have a new name. It must a combination of the first letter of your first name, the third letter of your middle name and the last letter of your last name.
Peace out! Somebody might wanna turn on a fan in here.

1. "Hello, my groovy name is [not repeatable here, and anyway, using the directions makes it all consonants and therefore totally unpronounceable] but you can call me Cat. By the looks of those flowers in your hair, you must be bored. Didn't they tell you? No fidgeting allowed!

2. Come on, Baby, light my cigar. When I lay me down to smoke I pray the smoke alarm and my parents will lay off tonight to keep. If I set fire to my bed before I wake, I pray the Fire Department my buts and ashtray to take. **puff puff**

3. Because the first time ever I saw your house I realized that what the world needs now is imaginative architects who are sweet but reasonable. Besides, I always feel guilty watching you fix your roof when I should be helping you. But I dig it!

4. Have I told you lately that I am very tired of you? Hey! Don't step on that toe!!
Dude. That guy is really weird but.....

5. There's a party in my sleeping bag and half a million of my most annoying friends are coming over tonight and we're gonna do whatever it takes to get my baby off my mind. Darn the luck. It's raining stroller(s) and umbrella(s). Luckily, Papa was a [R]olling Rock Beer rep and I'm on a first name basis with the cops. **puff puff**

6. I'm really digging your garden up but that rhododendron has got to go. Those flowers in your hair are beginning to smell like skunkweed. Have I told you lately that I can't stand the smell of you? ** puff puff**

7. I'm beginning to see a monkey in those trees over there. Do you see it? Out of all the millions of hippies here, you are the most straight-edge. But I dig it, man. **puff puff**

8. I'd use all my blood, sweat and money just to get next to your Ferrari. Love is free but I'd really like to buy that guy's convertible. It says "Make chicken not bratwurst." Far out!

9. I'm grateful to be nearly done 'cause there's a bad headache rising in Jefferson's Airplane. But that's okay, 'cause Joe Cocker said I could get by with a little vacation from my friends.

10. Oh, by the way, your burqa is on fire. But I dig it.

Saturday 9

(Link in blogroll)
On Broadway

1. Have you ever seen a Broadway play? If yes what and when?

I've seen several traveling Broadway productions--Les Miz, The Lion King, Mary Poppins--but nothing in New York. I have, however, seen two London remakes--Oliver! and Evita--in the West End.

2. Tell us about one strange event in your life this week.

My life is always strange. This week, I seemed to come across a lot of books about chickens and elephants. I don't know why.

3. Have you ever lied to "get the guy/gal"?

I've probably stretched some truths to the breaking point.

4. Tell us about your best friend.

I have a few besties. I think they are awesome; what more do you need to know?

5. What was the best vacation that you ever had?

I like the times I've spent doing nothing in particular: Ydra, Moosehead Lake, Ouray....

6. What was the last big purchase you made?

My glasses, which I haven't yet picked up. Although my phone wasn't exactly cheap either.

7. What is your favorite non-alcoholic drink and when did you start drinking it?

Diet Dr. Pepper. I've probably been mainlining it for 5 or 6 years.

8. When was the last time someone did not believe you?

I get disbelieving looks regularly while working at the Reference Desk. Otherwise, I have no idea. It's not like I make a habit of lying to people or anything.

9. You have signed on to direct a romantic comedy. Who are your stars?

Emma Watson. And, uh, maybe Shia LaBeouf?

Manic Monday

(Link in blogroll)

Do you have any idiosyncrasies or unusual quirks when it comes to food and/or eating?

I try to chew equally on both sides of my mouth to keep the wear on my teeth even. I try to eat half a sandwich all on one side and then the other half on the other.

Have you ever written love letters? If so, do you still have any of them?

I have. And I do.

How easy or difficult is it for you to say you're sorry?

It's easy to say it, but it's not always easy to mean it. It also depends on how much I'm invested in being right; if I don't care, an apology is pretty simple.