The Dating Profile Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
Walking in the Moonlight
This is a bit different than an "answer this question" meme. Either you have used sites such as Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, we scour those on-line dating sites to respond either a person's profile or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do. We use only "lines" that are gender-neutral. So, your mission is to respond to ten we choose each week. Seriously or with humor is your choice! [what are the odds, really, that I'm likely to EVER be serious on this meme?]

1. I love walks in the moonlight without ever having to say a word. In my world, walks never talk. This sentence would be more sensible if you rearranged the clauses so that YOU weren't saying any words. In fact, you should probably never speak again. kthxbai

2. I intend to go to my destiny instead of waiting on it to find me. Wait! Stop! That's MY destiny you're headed toward, not yours!

3. First off, I have 20 cats which I'm sure won't be a problem. [shit, it figures, as soon as I say I won't be serious on this meme...] Well, despite my nom de blog, cats are not my thing since I'm DEATHLY ALLERGIC TO THEM, ya crazy cat creep.

4. I've been called the 8th Wonder of the World. You're that old? And you're advertising that fact?

5. A nice thunderstorm with me and you will be wishing for rain. Er??? I don't get the reference. Nor do I want to. Yuck. Bye.

6. I've never been married, but don't let that scare you, it just happens to some of us. Shudder. Marriage is not chicken pox. Or amputation. Or...whatever.

7. The way I see it, life is a one-act play so am looking for someone who wants to make the best of every day. If you're going to use a metaphor, would you mind at least making a logical attempt to work it all the way out? And, frankly, most of us have more than one act in us. Thank GOD! I mean, high school alone ... gah ...

8. Jack, my border collie/lab, and I are often out walking or if we are lucky, playing in the mountains. "often out walking or [comma] if we are lucky [comma]..." or "often out walking or if we are lucky [no comma]" Take your pick. I like dogs. They don't fuck up grammar and punctuation. Can I take your dog and leave you home?

9. I would like to wake up in the morning to a loving warm smile and sexy eyes. Maybe you should date that Geico ad? I don't have sexy eyes, and my smile isn't particularly warm in the morning. Not till I've had 8-10 oz. of caffeine poured past it.

10. Hi! This is fun, no? No.

[actually, this is quickly becoming my favorite meme]