Monday's a Bitch

National Pride

1. Do you do anything special to celebrate your national holiday?

We sometimes have a cookout, or we go to a friend's house for a cookout. Sometimes we're out of town like last year. There's no "traditional celebration" for us in any case. We can see city fireworks shows for 3 towns from our backyard, so we will go outside tonight and see what we can see. Undoubtedly, our redneck neighbors will be attempting to start a tree on fire again today too...as they have been doing all weekend so far.

2. Would you go to war to fight for your country?

If we were being attacked, and if the future of my friends and family were on the line, yes. In fact, I probably will be fighting for my country over the next two years, as I consider the Bushies to have de facto declared war on the values the United States stands for. Those people simply have to be removed from positions of leadership.

3. What's your ethnic background?

Northern European mutt: sort of saluki-meets-borzoi with a dash of corgi thrown in, and some Boston bull.

4. Which iconic figure do you think best represents your country?

Thomas Jefferson sort of sums up the hypocrisy or dual-mindedness of us. Martin Luther King, Jr., appeals to our better side, and Carrie Nation warns us of what we could be like if we aren't a little more forgiving.

5. If I was visiting your hometown, what place or activity would you recommend to me?

My hometown? Or the area where I live now? If it were the former, there's nothing to do; it's a suburb, famous for nothing. Really. I'd be reduced to showing you the houses my dad built around town...about 20 of them.
If you came and visited me here, however, we could do the Groundhog Tour. Woo. Hoo.