The Dating Profile Meme

(Link in meme-roll)
Who'da Thought

This is a bit different than an "answer this question" meme. Either you have used sites such as Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, we scour those on-line dating sites to respond either a person's profile or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do.

1. This is something I thought I would never be doing, but some of my friends have met some really nice people this way.

Which is good, since I'm eminently NOT a nice person. But nevermind all that....

2. Having an open mind and being able to share special intimate moments as we grow closer and becoming each others best friend.

And always making sure verbs remain in the gerund form so we are never actually saying or doing anything.

3. They say this works.... It's a numbers game... start clicking!

I like darts better.

4. oK... ABOUT ME: I'm the best. Let's get off this site and get going!

Not so fabulous about proofreading, though. Check that caps-lock key, T.B.

5. If it gets past "not totally turned off" to "happy to hear the phone ring" then all this match adventure will be worth the work and the real adventure can begin.

You are telling me a little too much about how this has worked for you in the past.

6. Looking to enjoy life and live as if each day were your last and dance like no one's watching! I love having a great time!

Can't we live as if today is your last day instead? At least until we get to know each other.

7. I'm tired of the whole bar scene. I'm a soon to be 40 year old who thinks love is an admirable goal but knows that a solid friendship is pretty worthwhile too.

...as a fallback position, in fact, it's my favorite. Position, that is. Falling. Backwards. Yeah, y'know. Bye.

8. Please note that my divorce is not finalized just yet, but will be in the next couple of months.

Funny, your mouth is moving but I can't hear you. And this isn't even a video link!

9. I'd appreciate your taking the time to read my profile, though it is quite lengthy.

Sorry. Time is money, and your account is already overdrawn.

10. I want to find that “when I see you I want to run into your arms” kind of love.

Ouch. Fist-bumps are a whole lot less painful.