It's Irony Night!

(found here)

#222

1. Who is your favorite Little Mermaid character? I. Have. Never. Watched. This. Movie.
(because I have a son, primarily--he wasn't interested, and neither was/am I!)

2. Do you pay attention to what you eat? I watch it all the way in...! No, I'm terrible, but extremely aware that I'm living on borrowed time right now.

3. Have you ever played any funny pranks on anyone? I suck at them, so no.

4. How late did you stay up last night? I think it was between 11:30 and midnight when I turned off the light.

5. Do you like Greek mythology? It's interesting, but I wouldn't stay home from a party to read it.

6. What is your favorite kind of sandwich? I've got some awesome ham salad in the fridge that I've been digging lately.

7. Who is a new friend you've made? Uh, how old are we here? Flashback to Kindergarten. Uh. Andrea, I guess.

8. Do you ever watch the dog shows on Thanksgiving day? You are clearly smoking crack: I wouldn't watch something that was on opposite a football game!

9. Can you tie a maraschino cherry stem in a knot with your tongue? I rely on Beast for this.

10. Do you know any card tricks? Like, two.

11. How old were you when you got your first piercing? 14. My only piercings, in my earlobes.

12. Do you like seafood? Yup.

13. If you could learn any foreign language, which would it be? Greek.

14. Do you like beards? On the right face, they are to die for.

15. When you are completely stressed, what do you do to chill out? Completely? I cry. Massively? I rant.

16. What was the last song you listenened to? No clue. Sparky just turned his radio on upstairs--I'm sure it's Green Day, but can't (quite) tell which one.

17. Who was the last person you flirted with? Fifth.

18. Do you like dreadlocks? I appreciate the concept and reasoning...but I think I'm too suburban to really approve in most cases.

19. Did you ever watch Nick at Nite when you were a kid? Uh, I was unable to do so since it didn't exist!

20. What is your favorite vegetable? I'd say onions because of their versatility.

21. Have you ever had to call the cops before? Yup. I've called 'em more in the past 5 years than I did for the rest of my life up to that point.

22. Do you like children? Ayup.

23. What is your favorite thing about amusement parks? Honestly? Leaving them. Dropping someone off and driving away.

24. Do you use chapstick everyday? Repeatedly.

25. Have you ever drawn a penis before? I don't tend to draw much. However, I'm sure I've grafitti'd something or other.

26. Have you ever gone horseback riding before? Just once. Would love to do it again.

27. Who was your first kiss? Ron.

28. What do you need to buy? I need to find something to wear to a funeral.

29. Can you play the piano? Rustily. I took lessons 30-plus years ago.

30. Have you ever left or found a message in a bottle? Nope.

31. What do you love most about your best friend? Honesty. Painful as it might be at times.

32. Do you like Guitar Hero? To be truthful, I'm afraid to play it, at least in front of anyone. And I'm sure I'd get addicted.

33. Do you own a lighter? Yup. Several.

34. Do you lock your doors when you're driving? Not usually, unless there's some reason to feel vaguely threatened.

35. What is your favorite kind of dog? Dander-free.

36. Do you like bright colored eyeshadow? I don't wear any makeup anymore. When I did, I never wore bright colors.

37. What do you have to decorate your room? Paint. Some cherished prints, paintings, and photos. My clothes, on a bad day.

38. Do you Febreze your room? Infrequently, if at all.

39. Do you have a favorite musician? Well, not really, but there are several I really like a lot.

40. Have you ever built a snow fort? Yup. I should do that again this winter. Maybe I wouldn't be so depressed for ten minutes.

41. What is your favorite kind of snack? I prefer sweets, thanks.

42. Has a teacher ever been mad at you? Well, SHIT yeah! Of course. I was a good kid, but I wasn't one of those hideously good kids.

43. What did you do on your first date? Went to a movie, after holding a car up while he changed a tire...having forgotten to replace the jack in the trunk. ;-) He was mortified. I was...well, surprised that he'd be mortified.

44. Do you have a box of old pictures? Thanks for reminding me! I have so many pictures it's criminal.

45. Where is one place in the world you want to go? Kenya.

46. Where is the last place you went to eat at? I don't remember. Faux-Louisiana-in-February.

47. Who's party was the last one you went to? Anniversary party last month.

48. Do you have any birthmarks? Yes. I've always known about one. I recently found out about another that's out of my view. :-o

49. What is the scariest movie? I don't see scary movies. I could barely make it through the first Lord of the Rings movie!

50. Does anyone have a crush on you right now? Hah--doubtful!


#223
102 Q's

Just You…

1. What’s your favourite sandwich filling? Uh...see #6 above.
2. Do you have any style icons? Amy. ;-) My sister Ellen had more elan than anyone else in my family.
3. What’s your skin colour? Orca belly.
4. What colours do you like to wear? Brown, tan, blue, green, yellow. Not so much red or white.
5. What do you like most about yourself? My forthrightness. Except when it gets me in trouble.

6. What colour eyeshadow do you wear? See #36 above.
7. What colour are your eyebrows? Brown.
8. Do you keep your armpit hair? WTF? No.
9. If someone hot asked to see you naked for $200 dollars, would you show them your assets? Nope. I'm not cheap.
10. What’s your cup size (If female)? Different from what it used to be.

11. How long is your hair? Nearly shoulder length.
12. Which family member do you look like most? My dad. I was told years ago that I look a LOT like his mom when she was the age I was then. (Convoluted much?)
13. How long do you spend in the bathroom? Define your terms, then I'll answer.
14. Do you walk around your house naked? Yeah, like that's going to happen with a teenage boy in my house!

15. Do you dance around your bedroom in your underwear? No.
16. What part of guys do you like the least? Their tendency towards bossiness.
17. What part of guys do you like the most? Their tears, because they are so infrequent.
18. What annoys you about guys? Didn't I just do this? OK, I wish they didn't always stink and make weird noises.
20. Describe your figure: Pear-shaped (in actual and idiomatic terms).

21. Describe your ideal man: Beast, age 22.
22. Do you like men with beards and goatees? I like facial hair, but not on everyone. Some guys just look funky with beards.
23. Do you like guys who are small in *that* department? In the facial hair department?? ;-)
24. What would be one of the things important to you in a relationship? Mutual trust.
25. How do you rate virginity? Good beat, but not-so-easy to dance to: I give it a 61.

26. Are looks important? Not looking awful is helpful.
27. Would you do topless modelling? I think I'm unhireable.
28. Would you get your nipples pierced? Not likely.
29. What’s the best word to use, ‘sleep with’ ‘shag’ ‘fuck’ ‘sex’ ‘make love’: Depends on what you are describing. Sometimes a fuck is just a fuck.
30. What is your most sexiest feature? I know what Beast would say, but I'm pleading the Fifth.
31. What is your least sexiest feature? Fifth.

The Stupid Ones…

32. Are you looking for a partner right now? I'm holding out for a hero.... ;-)
33. So you don’t have a crush on anybody? Not really.
34. What celebrities do you think are hot? I like Christian Bale (since he's all over the news right now), and Angelina Jolie (I don't like her, but she is hot).
35. If you could look like any celebrity, whom would you look like? Julia Roberts, but not quite so thin.
36. Green apples or red apples? Green, as in Granny Smith.

37. Lights on or off? I'm cracking up at the person who did this before me, who I think didn't go where I went when I saw the question. Ahem.
I generally prefer light, but there are times when lack of light is better. Ahem!
38. What time do you go to sleep? Sometime between 11 and 12 most night.
39. What TV do you watch on Fridays? Whatever Beast turns on. I rarely have control of the remote.
40. Are you still friends with everyone at school, if you have left? Not EVERYone--I wasn't friends with everyone when I was there, for God's sake! I have a few, actually several, high school friends with whom I'm in contact.
41. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? Oh who the hell knows!

42. What annoys your friends about you? ...you should probably be asking them this.
43. How high do you play your stereo? I haven't played the stereo in years. Literally. I generally turn the radio up LOUD when I'm home alone, but not quite so loud when there are others around.
44. What colour are your curtains? I have a variety of curtains: blue, beige, tan and beige striped, and red-bordered plaid.
45. What make mascara do you use? See #36 in the first list, and #6 above.
46. Where do you buy your clothes? Stores.

47. What are you thinking right now? I'm wishing I hadn't started this so late.
48. Are you on speaking terms with your parents? Uh...technically? Yeah...I guess.
49. Do you like children? As I said in #22 in the first list, yes, I do.
50. Has your love life been good or bad? I'd say it has excelled.
51. What was the last alcohol you drank? Wine, on Saturday. Yes, BEFORE I fell. ;-)

52. Are you scared of commitment? Nope.
53. Do you want a serious relationship? I'd rather have a silly one.
54. Are your parents religious? That would be affirmative.

In the Movies…

55. If you could remake/write/direct ANY movie AND star in it, what would it be? Why the FUCK would I want to do all of that?! If I could sing, I'd love to be in The Sound of Music, I guess.
56. Direct or produce? Produce.
57. Have you ever thought about working in the movie business? Yaaah, no!
58. What are, your favourite:

· Horror films: Uh, the only one I've seen is Psycho.
· Supernatural thrillers: Blergh....
· Action films: Die Hard, Lethal Weapon, I Robot.
· Comedies: Heathers, Monty Python & the Holy Grail, Caddyshack, Groundhog Day, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and so very many others.
· Historical dramas: Braveheart...I haven't seen too many of these that I went for because they almost always do something so anachronistic that it makes me NUTS!
· General drama: I like the Harry Potter Movies, what can I say?
· Tragedies: Do they even make these anymore? I loved Lawrence Olivier in Hamlet...actually I didn't mind Mel Gibson or Kevin Branagh's Hamlets either.
· Romantic: More blergh....
· Disney: Lion King, Mary Poppins.

59. What movie role can you imagine yourself playing? Since Disney is all over my mind tonight: Snow White.
60. What is the most non-scary horror film ever? Wouldn't have the first clue.
61. Who would be your love interest/lover in your movie? I would suffer through with Brad Pitt. Or any number of other attractive men. ;-)
62. What would your movie be about? I dunno, I'm the producer, man!
63. Where would it be set? Someplace that wasn't hideously cold.

64. What era? Oh, I wouldn't mind a nice costume drama.... Ooh, we could remake Jane Eyre!! 65. Who would be your co-stars? ...this subject is starting to annoy the crap outta me.
66. What would be the genre? I think I covered this in #64.
67. What movies are great to watch if you want to drool over the people in it? ...I would pay $10 to drool? Not.

Music…

68. Name all your favourite songs from 2 of your favourite bands: Oh, fuck RIGHT off!
69. What band could you NEVER stop listening to? The London Philharmonic.
70. What band/singer have you been listening to for years? Billy Joel. Annie Lennox. U2. Howard Jones. Melissa Etheridge. The Clash.
71. What CDs are you going to get next? 46664, and another one I can't remember that involves U2 and Africa.
72. Describe your music taste? All over the bloody map.

73. What was your music taste like four or five years ago? Ditto.
74. What singer would you most love to look like, or sound like? Could I ever be as cool as The Edge or Joe Strummer or Melissa or Slow Hand or...? No. So, none.
75. If you were in a band, what position would you take on (let's just say you CAN play some instruments if you can’t)? Bass guitar.
76. What kind of music would you play? Blues.
77. What bands would be your inspirations? For a partial list, see #74.

78. You can take 6 musicians for your band – who would you pick? As if I could really expect my top 6 faves to drop everything...yeah, no.
79. What band that you listen to now, can you see yourself getting sick of soon? I'm easily bored. So, all of them.
80. What would your music videos be like? I think I'd be like whoever that was who refused to do videos. Neil Young? Can't remember.
81. What movie has the best soundtrack? Chicago. And Grease. And Fiddler on the Roof. And The Lion King. And....
82. Besides CDs, do you still keep tapes (and what ones)? I have a large drawer full of them. My most treasured music one is of our church's music director when I was a teen.

83. Do you have any mixed albums? "Mixed albums"?? What, exactly, do you mean?
84. Do you listen to 80s music (if so, what bands/singers)? Of course I do.

More Random Questions…

85. List the stuff you hate; it can be anything: Gross food, arguments, posers, illness, allergies....
86. List the stuff you love; it can be anything: God, family, friends, nature, medical advances, babies....
87. Has your family ever walked in on you while you were naked/in your underwear? Yup.
88. Have you ever been sprayed with sewage? Uh, not sprayed, no.
89. What body sprays do you wear? Speaking of spraying...? I wear VS or Gossip perfume.

90. What’s your BEST facial feature? I like my nose.
91. What’s your WORST facial feature? My eyes.
92. What’s your favourite desert? The Gobi.
93. What was your last most hilarious thought? The last answer, since I'm sure "dessert" was meant. Well, I'm tired and easily amused.
94. What’s your favourite word? Cathexis

Dreams & Nightmares…

95. Have you ever dreamt of sex with someone you know? Uh, yeah.
96. Do you have a lot of nightmares? Not really.
97. What do you dream about in general? Mostly I am processing.
98. When you dream about friends, what are you doing? It varies widely.
99. What did you last dream about? I don't remember any recent dreams.

100. What was your last nightmare? Don't remember.
101. What have been your most interesting dream? Y'know, I'm really tired. Please stop talking about dreaming.
102. Have any of your dreams ever come true? Some.

#224

1. Where were you THREE hours ago? Right here.
2. What do you think of your LAST kiss? Lovely.
3. Are you wearing SOCKS right now? Nope.
4. When was the last time you went out of STATE? This last week.
5. Have you been to the MOVIES in the last 5 days? Nope.

6. is already in bed, asleep.
7. What was the last thing you had to drink? Drinking water all evening.
8. What are you wearing right now? T-shirt, capris, underwear, and jewelry.
9. What was your last purchase? Papa Murphy's pizza.
10. Last food you ate? Part of a Cinnabon.

11. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Still don't know...
12. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week? Not yet.
13. Do you have a pet? I don't.
14. What did you do last night? Drove home, unpacked, tried to get this computer to work...and went to bed.
15. has a hot date tonight and is still in the bathroom getting ready.

16. If you could be anywhere you want where would it be? In bed.
17. What is the last thing you purchased online? LL Bean backpack for Sparky for school.
18. One thing you hate about yourself? I have Foot-in-Mouth Disease.
19. What's your favorite soup? Baked potato.
20. Do you miss anyone? Mostly. Sometimes my aim improves.

21. Last movie you saw? Speed Racer.
22. What are your plans for the day? Finish this, go to bed.
23. Did you have fun today? I worked. I called some people, emailed a lot more. Visited two banks for info. Picked up prescriptions and pizza, and stopped at the p.o. box.
24. Who is your last text message from? Plock.
25. Were you an honor roll student in school? Indubitubly.

26. What do you know about the future? That I won't be in most of it, at least not here on earth.
27. Who was the last person you rode in a car with? Sparky and Beast, yesterday.
28. is paying bills and can't be interrupted.
29. Do you have a tan? I have more freckles than I did in May.
30. How old do you want to be when you have kids? I think I'll wait till I'm 29, eh?

31. Did you meet anyone new today? The people at the banks, the people at Papa Murphy's, the people at Walgreen's....
32. Do you have any tattoos or piercings? Piercings: yes. Tats: no.
33. How do you like your soda? Cold and caffeinated.
34. Do you like hot sauces? Yes, but they no longer like me so much.
35. What are you doing tomorrow? Shop for clothes, work, maybe pack.

36. What day is tomorrow? Wednesday.
37. What is your current mood? Tahred.
38. Why? I am in rather dire need of processing time this week.
39. Do you remember the first person you ever kissed? Yes. See second #27 above.
40. Do you have a crush on anyone right now? Nope.

41. If you could be on a TV show, which one would it be? It would NOT be Deadliest Catch! How about one of those Nanny shows...!?
42. Why? So I could drill some good sense into stupid parents.
43. Have you ever watched a movie and just "had" to do what they did? No. Else I'd've driven off a cliff.
44. Do you have a "face" you make in the mirror? Huh? No.
45. Ever use someone else's toothbrush? Yes, by accident or out of desperation.

46. Do you like/love the person you got this survey from? Don't even know her. Thank God, frankly.
47. Can you whistle? Yes, I can.
48. Can you wiggle your ears? Not without using my hands.
49. You have a song that comes on that you just "have" to turn up and sing to? Several, too many, in fact, to list.
50. Who are you thinking about right now? Propping my eyes open long enough to get upstairs.