Manic Monday

Birth Order


1. Where are you in birth order in your family- first, last, middle, only?

Because my oldest sister is 20 years older than me and my brother (nearest in age) is 10 years older than me, much of the time I lived at home I was an "only." I think of it as having many of the benefits and few of the negatives of being an only child. In terms of age, I'm actually nearer in age to my two oldest nieces. It's really bizarre, actually.

2. Do you think that has any affect upon your personality?

I don't think it's a personality thing, but being last definitely affected my upbringing: my parents were WAY more relaxed with me, I was "spoiled" (just ask my siblings, they'll fill you in--I don't think I was!), I was appreciated more than the rest of them because I was last...and so very separate from the others, and I got to see my sisters and brother raising their kids and learn what works, what's normal, and what kinds of things to avoid as a parent AND as a grandparent!

3. Do you buy into the stereotypes of birth order?

I think the broad generalizations make sense: Oldest as Caretaker and Perfectionist; Middle as the Ignored-and-Acting-Out and/or the Peacemaker; Youngest as Free Spirited Comedian. But every family has its own dynamic and sometimes that trumps generalizations. I will say that these broad generalizations fit my siblings (my oldest sis is a GIGANTIC perfectionist; my middle sisters picked up the Acting-Out--second oldest--and Peacemaker--middle middle; my brother was a mess: oldest boy, middle child, youngest for ten years...he probably needs about 10 years of therapy! And me: the paragon of the family--also the comedian, a perfectionist, and a wild--i.e. spoiled--child).

Just for fun, you can read about birth-order bias - research on birth order stereotypes in Psychology Today here.