Lazy Easter Sunday

(Swiped from Amy)

Have you ever had a dream that you chased only to be let down when you achieved it?

Not "let down" per se but this whole Being An Adult thing is not as advertised when I was younger. I don't really have high expectations anymore for most things--I tend toward realistic. Maybe cynical? Nah, not really. Just unwilling to live with massive, preventable disappointment.

Is there anything about the opposite sex you just don't understand or comprehend?

Well, the whole peeing standing up thing is complicated as far as I can tell, seeing as how it seems far more difficult than it sounds to hit a fairly good-sized target with any degree of regularity. Otherwise, men aren't any weirder than women, except for their general lack of a clue about women. ;-)

Who was your favourite teacher at school and why?

I struggle with this question because I had pretty excellent teachers throughout my educational career; it would be MUCH easier to list the crappy ones! I even had good Sunday School teachers. It's been fun, thanks to Facebook, to get to know some of these folks as people now that we're all adults. Supposedly.

What's your favourite party game?

Depends on the party. I love Sheepshead, but it isn't something most people can deal with. Poker is fun. Apples to Apples is fun. Whatever. I will play almost any game.

Is it acceptable or unacceptable to smack a child as form of discipline?

Sure. Punching is not ok. Slapping isn't even ok. But the occasional butt-swat is called for, as an attention-getting device. Note that word "occasional"--if you're doing it more than 5 times a week--depending a little on age and the personality of the child--you aren't doing it right.

Can a heterosexual male ever wear pink?

Sure. My dad wore pink. He was definitely hetero. How can I be sure? He wore a pink shirt with an orange-and-green plaid sport coat. {kidding}

Is it criminal to wear socks with sandals?

It's rather silly-looking, but some feet are not ready for public viewing. On the other hand, being comfortable around those you love gives people a bit of a free pass on Ugly Feet Syndrome.

If you were captain of a ship, what would you call it?

Lollipop. Question back though: since when do captains get to name their own ships?

If you were to join an emergency service which would it be?

Probably EMT. I would suck at fire/rescue, and being a cop doesn't really work for me either.

If you were to join one of the armed forced which would it be?

At this point, none of them would have me. However, back in the day, the only one I would have seriously considered was the Air Force.

What's the worst thing about being your gender?

The bleeding every month thing, when it was a thing for me, really just sucked. Not just the hassle, but the hormonal stuff and generally feeling like shit on a plate at least 2-3 days every month.

What's the best thing about being your gender?

Being pregnant.

If you swapped genders for a day how would you spend it?

Working out the Pee Mystery--though surely that wouldn't take all day. Would it? So I'd just spend my day as usual, otherwise. I mean, being male wouldn't change my ability to do my job. I'm not a pregnancy surrogate or anything.